“If you’d just like to step into the manager’s office.” by Karen Blayne

Oh by the way red tape first.

Be warned these short stories contain mature content or naughty bits and as such may corrupt you if you’re under 12, 16, 18, 21 or 25 depending where you live thus they are not suitable for you so put them back on the shelf and let them age for a year or two.

They were sort of scribbled for fun. They were first posted on asstr.org. If you’ve paid money for this book just be aware the author has not received any payment. In fact no one has permission to charge money for this book and copyright is retained by the author. All copies must be of the complete document. ©2014 Asstr.org accepts donations if you’re feeling rich or even if you’re not.

Luv Karen

The girl looked at him nervously. “Hi I’m Elizabeth from HR and I’m here to explain to you about your package.” “Package?” “Oh dear your supervisor was supposed to talk to you first, but anyway the chairman had a presentation about the cloud and decided the company would move to it forthwith. So naturally all the current computer staff have been given packages.” “Packages?” he asked again. “Termination packages, three months pay and a thank you letter personally signed by the chairman of the board.” She didn’t like the way he was looking at her. “I am authorised to negotiate an additional month’s salary if you walk out of the building with me now.”

Well four months pay he could live with that, five if you included this month’s pay as well, a new job wouldn’t be hard to find. “Thank you I accept.” She breathed a sigh of relief. Outside Matthew walked down the street and into the computer job agency.

“You wouldn’t have any ASP.NET experience would you?” The girl on the other side of the desk asked him. “Sorry just UNIX and Oracle database administration.” “There isn’t much demand for those just at the moment but something might come in the next week or two.” He had a horrible suspicion, “When was the last time you had a vacancy in either?” “We had one last year for an Oracle DBA but it filled very quickly. We haven’t actually had one for a UNIX administrator since I’ve been here.” He left his details with her and shaken he headed for his apartment. Well he’d probably have to move somewhere to get a new job and he could always rent Paul’s spare room if need be. He handed his notice in on the apartment and sat down to read up about ASP.NET which apparently was the trendy software of the week for writing web sites. Perhaps he’d write a web site for his C.V. then he could say he had experience in ASP.NET.

He purchased two year’s web site rental and threw together a dating web site but to avoid all the complications of handling credit cards securely he made it free to use but put a Google advert link in on the side. It was quite easy to sign up for the Google part he just had to give them his bank details put the supplied code into his web site and that was that. He added it to his C.V. job done and forgot about it when the phone rang. The young girl from the agency had remembered him, was he available to fly out of town tonight and sort out a database? He flew. A week’s work and they put him in a hotel, not the best in town but one that catered to consultants like himself with a hamburger bar right besides the hotel. They were putting in a new system but needed the old system sorting out as there was a last minute delay in new replacement system. A year later he was still there, each extension to the contract had been for a week at a time usually coming through on a Friday afternoon. But finally the job was done, their security cleaned up and the new system was in place. Still the short term contracts had paid well. He flew back home and moved into Paul’s spare room. Not an ideal arrangement but until he got himself a permanent job it would do.

It was mid month and he dropped by the empty bank to pay his credit card bill. “Hi we haven’t seen you for a day or two.” he explained to the teller that he’d been working out of town whilst she entered the details of his account number into her computer. There was pause, then she turned and said very carefully “If you’d just like to step into the manager’s office.” He wondered what was wrong, he’d been making good money and not spending very much living on expenses. She looked at his expression “It’s not bad its just we’d like to talk to you.” She fetched him a cup of coffee as he sat down and wandered out before coming back in. “It looks like no one is available but I can take you through it.” She brought up his account. “Normally most people keep a thousand or two in their account, the odd one or two ten thousand. Now here’s your current balance.” It showed just over four million. “The payments seem to be coming in from a company called Google. The last monthly payment was just over half a million dollars.” “It must be the web site.” “You mean they are paying personally rather through a company?” “Well yes I didn’t expect it would be this much money.” “You ought to set up a company to save some tax and at least put some of this money in term deposits or longer term investments.” “How would I do that?” “Hire someone?” “I don’t know anyone I trust.” “You could hire me.” “But you work at the bank.” “Three days a week part time, they give me more hours at month end. Yours is fairly simple to do it would take me no more than two days a week.” “How much would I save?” She pulled out a calculator and did a couple of calculations and showed him. “Well OK, will $50,000 a year do for the two days a week?” “Write down your address I’ll be there in the morning.”

The next morning she turned up at eight o’clock, Paul had left but Matthew had yet to have breakfast when she rang the door bell. “It’s not a bad apartment.” She commented as she came through the door. “It’s Paul’s I’m just renting his spare room.” “I think you could just about afford to buy your own. Mrs. Davis’s house is up for sale, it’s a bit shabby but its livable in and you could redo the kitchen etc.” “Who is Mrs. Davis?” “Oh one of the bank’s customers who died recently, no not at the house in hospital. It’s an estate sale.”

By the end of the day Allison had purchased Mrs. Davis’s house, arranged an off the shelf company and arranged for Google to pay the company rather than Matthew directly. That afternoon Matthew looked round his new home. “It could do with a good clean.” “A maid company?” “No perhaps yourself?” “I have enough to do cleaning up after my husband but you could always hire Jasmine. She’s just graduated with an English degree and is hesitating about applying for a minimum wage job in a library.” “Won’t cleaning be beneath her?” “Just offer her a job at $45,000 a year as an executive assistant, then its other related duties when she gets here.” He looked at her. “English grads just don’t get paid that sort of money, she’ll do it and be grateful for the work.”

Jasmine was delighted to be offered a post as an executive assistant. She looked forward to being able to use her brains and make a difference to the company. She was impressed that the interview had taken place over the phone, it showed that they were looking for someone with intelligence rather than just a good pair of legs or unmentionables. On her first day she raised the issue of benefits, what did the company drug plan cover etc? Allison looked at them both. “We haven’t any at the moment but I’ll look into it.” Jasmine asked what they wanted her to do. “Well essentially check the entire web site for grammar and spelling and anything else that needs doing.” Jasmine took a deep breath, sounded like a really responsible job. That afternoon she’d double checked every word, phrase and sentence on the first two pages. “I’ve done the first two are there any more?” she enquired of Matthew who was lazing back sipping coffee and reading through a pile of paperbacks in the sun. “My coffee mug needs filling.” He murmured. She thought about telling him what he could do with his coffee mug but then thought twice before saying anything, “and after that there are a few fiction books that need reading.” She got him a coffee then after she’d glanced at the state of the kitchen she tackled the washing up and wiped the counter tops down.

Next morning she greeted Allison with the words “Tell me I’m not just a glorified maid?” “And keep a straight face?” “He could have two maids in a car twice a week for a fraction of what he’s paying me.” “True but then he wouldn’t have anyone to check his grammar if he decides to do another web page and its not bad pay for an English graduate.” “There is that I suppose, and you never know I gain some useful experience.”

“We’re here about the part time work?” Matthew looked up at Allison. “We need six employees minimum for the drug plan.” “So an hour a month at twenty an hour?” he asked mischievously. “It takes half an hour to get here and half an hour back , its hardly worth it for twenty a month.” “It does have benefits though.” “A drug plan isn’t going to make that much difference to my life, now if it was free accommodation then you’d be talking.” Matthew shrugged “There’s two spare rooms upstairs.” The dark hair student blinked, “You’re serious?” “Take a look at them first, you’ll need to furnish them, Allison will give you a budget.” “We get fed as well?” “As long as I get some when you cook.” The two students dashed upstairs. “So that makes five not six?” “Oh my husband has expressed a willingness to come round to do an hours gardening once a month.”

The door bell rang, “Hi I’m your next door neighbour, would you and your significant other like to come round to dinner on Thursday?” Matthew replied, “I’m Matthew but I’m sorry to say I don’t have a significant other.” The neighbour looked round at Allison and Jasmine. “Oh he has a home business sort of thing we’re just his employees, and the two girls coming downstairs are two student lodgers.” “Well we’ll expect to see just Matthew on Thursday at 7 then.” Jasmine mistrusted her as she left looking as if she was a cat who had found the cream pot. “So what do I need to do to become a significant other?” She boldly asked him. “Something significant?” She unzipped her skirt and let it fall to the floor. “Significant enough?” She asked lightly. Matthew paused and put his book down. Jasmine undid her blouse slowly a button at a time, then turned her back to him and shrugged it off her shoulders before unclipping her bra and letting it drop to the floor. She turned back to him covering her breasts with her arms. Matthew was giving her his full attention now. The two students came up besides him, “What are you doing?” “Well if madam gets her way I think Matthew will be introduced to a female at her dinner party.” “Whoops not good for us part timers in the spare bedroom.” “So I’m working on him to become the significant other.” A hand reached down and unzipped Matthew, a second hand stroked him up and down. Jasmine stepped forward and pushed her nipple between his lips. Matthew heard footsteps going towards the kitchen then returning. “Here try some honey. Now Matthew are you quite sure you wouldn’t prefer to eat at home?”