Note: This story was dynamically reformatted for online reading convenience.
 
 Author: Hungry Guy
Title: IT WAS A DARK AND STORMY NIGHT
Summary: You're making out with your girl in your van on a lonely road
during a freezing rainstorm.  You're about to get laid.  She has to pee. 
What do you do?
Keywords: MF F/M Mpov Fdom Msub 1st cons oral ws rom humor true
Language: english

   IT WAS A DARK AND STORMY NIGHT BY: Hungry Guy (hungry@stoolmail.zzn.com)

   It was a dark and stormy night.  It was also one of the best nights of
my life.

   I started dating Meryl a few weeks ago.  Meryl wasn't model material,
but neither was I a jock.  She was cute, with short straight black hair,
big brown eyes, and a pretty face.  I was a tall, skinny, awkward geek who
was lucky to get such a cute girl to go for me.

   She and I were in the same Freshman English class and when we discovered
that we lived in the same dorm, well, it was natural that we always walked
to class and back together.  It wasn't long before I asked her out.

   We both went to our rooms after class.  My roommate was already there,
getting ready to go out.  I went down the hall to the unit bathroom to
shower, returned to my room to change, grabbed my coat, then went down to
her room.  From there, we went to grab dinner at the puketeria.  That's
when it started to rain.

   Although I had a car -- a van actually -- I usually took the off-campus
bus downtown because I don't like to drink and drive.  (Shhh!  Don't tell
my friends that I'm such a chicken shit.)

   But with the rain and all, Meryl insisted that I drive.  So after
dinner, we trudged out to the student parking lot.  We would have stayed
drier had we just cut through the other dorms and academic buildings to the
student center and waited for the bus and then got off the bus right at the
corner and walked into the bar.  But, well, try to disagree with a woman
using logic and reason when she knows she's right about something, and see
where it gets you -- right guys?  We've all been there.

   So we got to my van -- it was a nice one too.  I had customized the back
with carpeting, paneling, curtains, flip chairs, lava lamps, black lights,
beanbags, pillows, and a small color TV and Nintendo video game (yes, we're
going back a few years), and a small refrigerator.  The fridge was even
stocked with a case of Guinness that I hadn't touched since the beginning
of the semester.

   We got in and we were drenched and freezing.  So I cranked the heat to
max.  I popped Alan Parsons Project into the eight-track as we left the
campus and headed down Main Street to the Rathskellar.

   We were warm and dry by the time we got downtown.  We parked in the
packed muddy lot behind the bar and walked through the pouring rain once
again.  By the time we got inside, we were drenched again.  The bar was a
large rustic building with booths all along the perimeter of the first
floor, except for one wall where the long bar was placed.  The middle of
the room was a large open space for dancing, and was open to the second
floor where booths lined the balcony.  We walked up to the bar and I asked
her, "What're you drinking, sweetheart?"

   She answered, "I'll just have a Bud."

   So I pulled out a couple of bucks from my pocket and waved them at
Jerry, the bartender.

   The bar was crowded and it took Jerry a few minutes to work his way down
to our end of the bar.

   "What're you having tonight?" he asked.

   "A Bud for my girl, and a Coke for me."

   "You're staying dry tonight?" he asked.

   I would have loved to get wasted tonight, but like I said, I was too
much a wuss to drink and drive.  I answered, "Yeah, I drove instead of
taking the bus.  You know, 'cause of the pouring rain."

   "Smart thinking, dude!" he said as he handed us our drinks.

   Being a college bar, it filled up fast early on Friday and Saturday
nights.  Downstairs was packed already, so we wove our way through the
crowd and up the spiral stairs to the second floor balcony where it wasn't
so crowded yet and we could get a booth overlooking the dance floor.

   We took seats in the booth and piled our coats one seat.  We were facing
each other across the table, and took each other's hands.  The only problem
with being upstairs was that there were about four or six huge Klipsch
speakers handing from the ceiling cranking Van Halen, Motley Crue,
Supertramp, Electric Light Orchestra, The Cars, Dire Straits, Lake,
Journey, Foreigner, and other groups that nobody remembers any more.  Since
we couldn't talk, we just sat there holding hands and smiling at each
other, and occasionally taking a sip of our drinks.

   After we finished our drinks, the DJ started to play a slow song by
Journey, so I yelled, "Want to dance?"

   She smiled, and slid out of the booth pulling me by the hand behind her.

   We made our way back downstairs and found a square inches of dance floor
to squeeze into.  It felt so good when Meryl put her arms around my neck
and pressed her body tightly against mine as we swayed -- I wouldn't really
call it dancing -- to the music.

   The DJ played two more slow songs after that and I wondered if Meryl
could feel my hard-on throbbing between where our crotches were squeezing
it between them.

   The rapture ended when Supertramp started wailing _Bloody Well Right,_
and so we made our back to the bar.  Even though there were now four guys
working the bar, we had to wait nearly 15 minutes to get served.  Meryl got
another beer, and I got another Coke.

   We slowly made our way back upstairs, but all the booths were taken and
it was standing room only wherever we went.  At least we found an empty
spot at the railing and we hung out there watching the people below as I
put my arm around Meryl.  When she put her arm around me too, it felt so
good to know that I was a wanted man.

   That's when I heard, "Hey, duuuude!" from behind us.

   We turned to see our friends, Al and Paula.  After high-fives all around
(jeez, do I even remember how to do a high-five?), the four of us talked --
shouted actually -- about our Psych 101 papers due next week, and how
nobody understands Professor Vishnu with his accent, and how it sucks that
the government wants to raise the drinking age to 21.

   They then headed off to the bar, and Meryl and I went back to watching
the action below us.  That's when I caught Meryl looking at me, staring
actually.  So I stared back.  Her head imperceptible moved closer to mine,
and so I moved a little closer too.

   I wondered.  Did she really want to make out?  Here in the middle of
this crowd?

   Our faces moved closer, molecule by molecule, until our lips touched. 
Suddenly, the crowd and the noise disappeared.  I almost squeaked when I
felt her press her tongue between my lips into my mouth.  Of course, I
reciprocated, and our tongues were quickly dancing together exploring each
other's mouths.

   When we came down from orbit, I had no idea how much time had passed.  I
just grinned at her with a silly smile, then I leaned closer and shouted in
her ear at the top of my lungs, "I love you, Meryl!"

   We both looked around to see if the people pressed up against us heard,
but they didn't seem to, then she leaned over to me and screamed in my ear,
"I love you too!"

   Wow!  That was the first time a girl ever told me that she loved me. 
Not knowing what to say next, I shouted back, "I feel wonderful!  Want
another drink to celebrate?"

   But I was suddenly hurt and disappointed when she shouted, "No thanks!
Let's go!  Too noisy!  Too crowded!"

   I couldn't help agreeing with her, so I figured it was time to call it a
night too.

   We stopped at the booth we first sat at and rooted through the huge pile
of coats that had accumulated on that one bench.  Wwe got ours and headed
back downstairs, but we had to stop in the restrooms before we left (oh
man, restrooms in bars are _filthy_ and they _stink),_ then we headed back
to the van.  When we got outside, it was hard to believe that the rain
could have got any harder or colder then when he came in, but it was.  Once
again, we were drenched and freezing when we got back to my van.  I
wondered if we were going to make out again when we got back into my van;
but being soaked and frozen, I honestly wasn't in the mood (and if a guy
isn't in the mood, I can't imagine how not-in-the-mood a woman must be).

   So I popped The Knack in the eight-track and we drove back to campus
where I parked in the student lot as far away from civilization I had been
parked when we left.  At least we were warm and dry once again, though that
was about to change -- again.

   I was about to open the door, but Meryl put her hand on my arm and said,
"Can we wait until the rain lets up?"

   "Sure," I answered.

   The rain sounded like a freight train pounding the roof of the van, and
I could even feel the van swaying from time to rime from the howling wind.
So I started the small auxiliary engine that kept the battery charged and
ran the heat and accessories when the regular engine isn't running.  Then I
climbed out of the driver's seat to the back of the van, dropped my coat on
the floor, as did Meryl, and headed for the fridge in the back.

   I opened the fridge and asked, "Want a beer?"

   "Sure," she answered.

   I grabbed two bottles of Guinness and scrunched into one of the
beanbags. I shouldn't have been surprised when Meryl immediately sat in my
lap leaning her shoulder against my chest as she took her beer.

   _The Knack_ started singing _Good Girls Don't._ and I mentioned,
"Someone told me they curse in this song."

   "Naw," Meryl answered, "they just sing about how she sits on his face."

   "Oh?  Sounds like fun!" I blurted out, then immediately regretted saying
that to Meryl.

   Meryl just giggled and I could feel my face turning red as a beet, so I
gulped a big chug of beer.

   Meryl took a swig of hers then she looked me squarely in the eyes again,
I knew exactly what she wanted.  I leaned forward again, and we were in a
lip-lock once again.

   But I could hardly believe what she did next.  She grabbed one of my
hands and planted it firmly on one of her boobs.  Oh man, I could feel her
nipple trying to poke though her bra and blouse -- just like my cock was
trying to bust out of my pants.

   "You like my tits?" she asked.  I couldn't believe she asked that; hell,
I couldn't believe she was letting me feel her tits after dating for just a
few weeks.  Her tits weren't huge; they were rather tiny actually.  But
they fit her cute little body perfectly.  Huge melons on Meryl would have
looked wrong, somehow.

   "Yeah!  They feel so soft!" I was surprised that it felt so soft and
squishy; I had expected it to be hard like a muscle (hey, c'mon, I was a
virgin geek at the time).

   I think I got over being shocked when she next asked, "You want to see
'em?"

   "Yeah!" Of course I wanted to see them!

   While still in my lap, she leaned back and lifted her leg up over my
head so as to face me with her legs wrapped around my waist.  She the
pulled her blouse up over her head and tossed it on the floor.  Then she
reached behind her and slowly pulled her bra off.  Her two tiny tits were
staring right at me with her nipples pointing straight out like to tiny
cocks with little hard ons.

   I lifted my hands up to almost touch them, when she said, "Go ahead!"

   I put my hands to them and brushed my fingers over them.  I soon had her
nipples in my fingers and began gently squeezing them.

   She smiled at me and said, "Oh, that feels so good, mmmmmm."

   After a few minutes, she asked, "You can do better, can't you?"

   I stammered, "I, uhm." I thought I was doing it good and I didn't know
how to do it any better.  But after that briefest of moments, she leaned
back and pulled my head forward pressing my mouth to her swollen nipple.

   She threw her head back and immediately began moaning, "Oh yes!  Do
that! Keep doing that!"

   I kept doing that.

   After countless minutes, without saying a word, she pulled back, turned
her torso a little, and pressed the other nipple to my mouth.

   After a symphony of cries and moans, she fell backward with her ass
still in my lap and her legs still wrapped around my waist.  She was
lifting her hips up with her legs and the sight of her jean-covered crotch
rising and setting in front of my chest was almost more than I could take.

   She interrupted my shock when she blurted, "What are you waiting for?"

   Did she really want me to touch her pussy outside her jeans?  I couldn't
believe it, but I wasn't sure.  I cautiously reached out and slid my finger
along the seam in her jeans that ran from her zipper to her ass.  Then back
up again.

   "C'mon, you can use a little more force.  I won't break!"

   Using two fingers, I slid them up and down her pant seam, pressing down
with more force where I thought her pussy was.  The van rocking in the
storm jiggled my hand gently from side to side as I slid it up and down.

   She was moaning once again, "Oh yes!  Oh God!  Oh yes!"

   I also was harder than I ever remember being.  I could feel the pressure
building up in my balls and I was afraid I was going to cum in my pants.  I
wouldn't have minded coming in my pants just then, but if she was going to
let me go all the way before the night was over, I wanted to save it for
her.

   Fortunately, just then she asked, panting, "Hey!  You want to see it?"

   "Oh yeah!  Yes!" I answered back.

   "Then pull my jeans down!"

   I unbuckled her belt, unbuttoned her jeans, and pulled the zipper down.
Then I grabbed them and pulled them toward me.  Fortunately, I also grabbed
her panties and I grabbed her jeans.  A moment later I had pulled her jeans
and panties down to my waist since her legs were still wrapped around my
hips, and I was staring into a live girl's hairy cunt for the first time in
my life.  I was frozen in panic at the sight.

   She saved me by crawling backwards off me a little, then pulled her
shoes off, and then pulled jeans and panties all the way off.  Then she sat
up and smiled at me as if she was waiting for me to make the next move.

   I stammered out, "You want to see mine now?"

   "Uh, huh!" she answered with a grin.

   With that, I pulled my shirt up over my head, and then kicked my shoes
off.  Then I pulled my jeans down.  Though she was sitting there completely
naked, I was terrified to remove my Jockeys in front of her.  Still I
swallowed and pulled them down as my cock bounced up to attention as the
elastic waist strip flipped past it.

   "Wow!" is all she said.  I didn't know if my cock deserved a "wow," but
it sure made me feel better about showing it to her.

   Still, I couldn't believe it.  I couldn't believe I was with Meryl and
she was letting me see her naked.  I didn't want to sound like a geek and
say so, but I knew that she must have really trusted me to get naked with
me.  I swore to myself that I would return that trust by trusting her as
much.

   She seemed to get impatient with my hesitation.  She crawled next to me
and grabbed my hand again.  This time, she placed it onto her crotch,
pressing my fingers between her pussy lips.  It sure felt wet in there!

   "Oh!  Oh!  Oh!" she moaned yet again.

   I continued rubbing her pussy with my fingers.

   "Oh wait!" She said.

   "What?" I asked.

   "Just a second." She reached for her clothes and started pulling her
pants on.

   _Oh-my-God-did-I-do-something-wrong?_

   "What's wrong, Meryl?" I asked trying to hide the panic in my voice.

   "Nothing wrong, lover!  I just have to take a piss.  I'll be right back!
Honest!" and winked at me.

   "Didn't you piss before we left the bar?"

   "The women's room was so filthy; I couldn't.  Don't worry.  I'll be
right back!"

   Actually, I had to piss again too.  I said, "Wait, Meryl.  Don't go out
in the storm to pee.  I have just the thing!"

   I picked up an empty bottle and said, "Here, use this!"

   "What?" she asked.  "An empty beer bottle?  How?"

   I've pissed in jars and bottles lots of times when a toilet wasn't
handy, when camping and such.  I held the bottle to my dick and grunted. 
The piss wouldn't flow.  I've pissed in front of other guys before, but I
realized that it might be difficult to pee in front of a girl.  Once again,
I closed my eyes and let myself relax.  Finally, I felt the pee flowing
down my dick and into the bottle and made a tinkling noise.  I opened my
eyes to see that Meryl seemed fascinated by me pissing into a bottle.  I
filled the bottle halfway before I emptied myself.  I opened the side door
part way, letting a cold blast of air and water in, and emptied the piss
onto the ground.

   I closed the door and handed her the bottle.  "See?  Just pee into the
bottle."

   "I can't pee into a bottle, dummy!"

   "Why not?  Sure you can!"

   "Uhm, I'm not made the same way as you.  I can't!"

   The last thing I wanted right now was for Meryl to get dressed.  The
second-to-last thing I wanted was for Meryl to go outside into the freezing
wind and rain.  Without thinking, I dropped on to my back and blurted out,
"Use me, Meryl!"

   "What?" she asked.

   "You can pee in my mouth!  And I'll pee in the bottle for both of us."

   "That!  That's!  That's disgusting!" she screamed.

   _Oh shit!_ I thought.  _I ruined it now!  Fuck!_

   Then she smiled and said, "Thanks for the offer, but I'll be fine."

   She pulled her jeans and blouse on and then her shoes.  She opened the
door to the van, letting another blast of freezing rain and wind, and
stepped outside.  When closed the door behind her, I noticed that she left
her bra, panties, and socks on the floor.  I suppose that was a good sign.
A moment later, the door slid open again, and Meryl climbed back in.  In
the moment that she was outside, her coat was covered with ice and hair had
become a solid mass of ice.  She was visibly shaking.

   "That was the fastest anyone has ever peed!" I said, then "Are you okay,
Meryl?"

   "I...  I..." she stammered.

   I hugged her, rubbing the ice from her hair.

   "I couldn't pee.  It's fucking freezing out there!" she said as her
teeth chattered.

   That's one of the few times I'd ever heard Meryl curse.

   She looked down at the floor and hesitated a moment before continuing,
"I'll take you up on your offer if, uhm, if it's still good."

   I almost asked, "What offer?" before I stopped myself, and said, "Yeah,
sure."

   Once again, she removed her clothes while I lay back down and put my
head on a pillow.

   Then she knelt down next to me and swung a leg over me, straddling my
chest.  My cock had gone soft the past few minutes, but it had become hard
again, and my heart was pounding.

   She crawled up me on her knees until her cunt was directly over my face.
Man, it was so hairy!  And, well, it was so close to my nose that I could
smell it -- and it didn't smell very nice.

   Guys always talk about "going down at the 'Y'," and they say it's an
acquired taste.

   Still I couldn't believe a woman's naked cunt was inches away from my
face and she was about to sit on my face with it.  Then I nearly jumped out
of my skin when she suddenly asked, "You sure you don't mind doing this for
me?"

   "I don't mind, Meryl.  Really!"

   Then that's what she did.  She lowered herself onto my face, pressing
her cunt against my mouth as I opened my mouth wide.  Her hairy muff was
tickling my nostrils and I slowly looked up her body past her muff, past
her bellybutton, between her titties sticking out of her chest, at the
bottom of her chin.  She looked down at me and we locked eyes for a moment
before she looked away and closed her legs, plunging me in darkness.

   I could hear her heart pounding over mine.  I could even feel her heart
pounding over mine.  I was both excited and terrified at what it would be
like.  Would it have any taste?  Would it taste like water, or would it
taste like I was drinking pure filth?  Would I be able to drink it as fast
as she pissed it out, or would she fill my mouth until it sprayed out
between my lips and her cunt making a mess?

   I could breathe, but the airflow was restricted what with my nostrils
pressed gently against her crotch.

   I wondered what was taking so long, but Meryl answered my question for
me, "Sorry to take so long, but the pee isn't coming out.  I've never peed
into someone's mouth before.  I have to relax first."

   I waited.  And waited more.

   Then I felt it.  A steady trickle of liquid splashed against the tip of
my tongue.  It collected at the back of my throat as I held my throat
closed.  Fortunately, it had no taste, though I thought I could taste
something gritty in it.

   I thought about trying to swallow while she peed, but it was nearly
impossible to swallow while lying on my back as she pressed her twat
tightly to my open mouth.  I could tell that she hadn't put her full weight
on my jaw, still she bore down with considerable weight.

   I almost panicked as my mouth got to be full, but then she stopped.  She
lifted off me and slid her ass back, sitting on my chest.

   I leaned forward a little and swallowed.  It didn't taste so bad.  It
tasted sort of what ammonia smelled like, but very mild.

   I looked up at her looking back down at me.  She asked, "You don't look
so good.  You okay down there?"

   I smiled up at her and answered, "I'll live."

   She got off me and crawled over to the fridge and grabbed two more
beers.

   Then the taste really hit me!  My moth suddenly tasted the way a dirty
public restroom smelled.

   Handing me a beer, she said, "Here.  This will kill the taste of my
piss."

   I sat up, grabbed the beer, and chugged the whole thing down all at once
to wash away the taste of her piss.

   She was laughing her ass off as I threw the bottle down.  I took a
breath of fresh air and grabbed one more beer and then motioned for her to
sit in my lap again, which she did.

   We each drank our beers, then Meryl and I resumed sucking face.  I was
in heaven!  Maybe you're getting sick of hearing this, but I couldn't
believe that Meryl, _my Meryl,_ and I were naked together, and she had just
sat on my face with her cunt against my mouth and she just pissed in my
mouth.  I just drank another person's piss!  I just drank a woman's piss! I
just drank Meryl's piss!  Straight from her cunt!  Oh man, oh man!

   And now we were kissing.  What a night!  And it was just beginning.

   Not only that, but my cock was sticking into Meryl's ass crack, being
that she was sitting on my lap.  I could feel pre-cum oozing out my cock,
and I was about to explode any second.

   I think Meryl sensed that too because she said, "Oh my, you're about to
burst, my lover."

   "Yeah!  I think I'm about to come any second, Meryl!  And I don't think
I can stop it!"

   I started panting as I felt the pressure quickly build in my cock.  "Oh
man!" I screamed.

   Meryl quickly pushed me down on my back, crawled down my body and
engulfed my cock in her mouth.  I exploded into her mouth the instant her
lips closed around the base of my cock.

   Oh man!  I had fantasized about this for years, and now it was really
happening.  My body was bucking wildly as I shot wad after wad of cum into
a woman's mouth.

   My quaking finally subsided as I shot the last wad into her mouth.  She
slid her mouth off my cock and sat up at me, smiling.

   "Got a tissue?" she mumbled as cum dripped from her mouth.

   "Hey," I said, "I swallowed your piss -- you can swallow my cum!"

   She made a face for a second, then swallowed.

   I wanted to kiss Meryl so much for what she just did for me, but with
her mouth just having been full of my cum, the idea of kissing her turned
me off.  So I grabbed two more beers from the fridge and we drank to love
after she climbed back into my lap yet again.

   We returned to kissing after we had chugged a bit of beer and she had
replaced the taste of my cum from her mouth with the taste of Guinness.

   We continued kissing and drinking until we finished the beers again.

   I had, by now, got a good beer buzz going, and I whispered in Meryl's
ear, "Let me up, I got to take another piss."

   She got off my lap and I pissed into another empty bottle.  As before,
the freezing wind blew into the van when I opened the door to empty the
bottle.

   Then Meryl crawled over to me with the silliest look in her eyes.  I
could tell that she was feeling pretty good too.  But then she whispered in
my ear, "I got to pee again too, sweets."

   I said, "okay," or something like that.

   After a few moments, she sounded impatient when she said, "C'mon!  I
have to pee!"

   I was about to say something like, "So what?" when it dawned on me what
she was waiting for.

   I wasn't sure if I wanted to do that again.  "You want to use me again?"

   "The wind is still howling and it hasn't got any warmer since before."

   She was probably right.  If anything, it must be getting colder and
colder as the night drew on.

   "I'm not sure if I can do that again, Meryl."

   "But I got to pee!" she insisted.  "Bad!"

   "Well, I don't know," I answered.

   "Well I know," she said.  "I need to pee.  You want to get laid.  You do
the math."

   I was dumfounded.  Before, it was "disgusting." Now it's my price for
getting laid.

   I gave in and said, "Okay."

   She was kneeling and set a pillow between her legs.  I lay on my back
with my head on the pillow between her thighs looking up at her upside
down.

   I suddenly realized that I might have made a mistake in lying like that.
She lifted herself up and crawled forward over my face.  I opened my mouth
just as she lowered her cunt to my mouth, burying my nose in her ass crack.
She was squeezing my nose with her asshole and I swear I could smell her
shit.  Talk about gross!

   On top of that, she wasn't sitting on my lightly like before.  I swear
she must have placed her full weight on my face for it felt like my skull
was being crushed under the weight of a padded anvil!

   I suddenly realized that I couldn't breathe.  My nose was buried in her
ass crack, possibly even sticking up into her asshole, and my lungs were
straining for air.  I waved my arms trying to push her thighs up off my
head, but she just grabbed my wrists and held my arms still.  At that
moment, she began filling my mouth once again with her rancid piss, and
there was nothing I could do about it.

   As she filled my mouth, I also realized with some panic that her piss
wouldn't just squirt out between my lips and her pussy.  Her cunt lips
pressed against my mouth lips under so much weight that I would probably
inhale her piss if I didn't swallow it while she was pissing into my mouth.


   My lungs were screaming for air, but I managed a swallow a little
without choking.  Then I swallowed a little more.  She continued pissing,
and I managed to swallow a few more times.

   I was lucky to have swallowed when I did for my mouth was full when she
finally stopped.

   She slid her ass back off my face as I swallowed her remaining piss and
gasped for breath.

   When she broke out in hysterical laughing at this, I just asked, "What's
so funny?"

   "You are, my love!" she answered, and I couldn't be angry any more.

   She kissed me and took two more beers out of the fridge.  I was sitting
there feeling dizzy from the beers, and queasy from drinking her piss.

   She staggered back from the fridge with two beers in hand and planted
her ass in my lap yet again.

   We took a couple of swigs from our beers.

   I wasn't prepared, however, when she then declared, "It's my turn now,
lover!"

   "Your turn?" I asked.  "Your turn for what?"

   "To come, silly!"

   "Oh, yeah," I said, realizing that she hadn't come yet.  "So let's
fuck."

   "No," she said, "you eat me first, then we fuck."

   Oh, I knew what she meant, so I said, "Okay."

   She got off my lap and lay on her back pointing her hairy cunt at me
between her spread-wide legs.

   I had to pee again something fierce, so I asked her if I could pee
first, since I was peeing for both of us.  She said "okay," and so I pissed
in an empty bottle again and emptied it out the door.

   Then, I got on my stomach and crawled between her legs.  I've read _Joy
of Sex_ and other like it, but coming face-to-cunt was intimidating.  It
didn't look like anything I'd seen in the books.  Her ass crack came up
from under her ass and disappeared into a thick mass of hair that expanded
up onto her belly.  I looked up at Meryl with a sheepish expression and
asked, "What exactly to do I do?"

   "Spread my cunt lips apart and start licking.  I'll tell you when you've
found the right spot."

   I reached out and pressed my fingers into the mass of hair and, wow! 
Her crack spread open revealing a bright pink chasm.  I couldn't see any
details, but I put my mouth to it and started licking.  Fortunately, my
tongue could feel the textures that my eyes couldn't see.  Starting just
above her anus, but without touching it, I licked up.  I came to a hole
that could only be her vagina.  I began licking it and fucking it with my
tongue.  I noticed it got rapidly wetter as I licked it, and the wetness
wasn't coming from my saliva.

   "Yes!" she squealed.  "That's good!  That's good.  Now move up."

   I didn't know why she wanted me to move away from her vagina, but I
moved my mouth higher.  I passed a tiny bump and came to where the dry
hairy surface skin met at the top.  I continued licking up into her muff,
and got a mouthful of hair.

   "No, silly!  You went past it.  Go back down."

   I went back down into the crevice.  She yelled, "Stop!  There!" when my
tongue passed over that little bump.

   "That's my clit!  Lick that!  Suck it!  Beat it up!"

   I'd read that a woman's clit is the sensory equivalent of a man's
cock-head.  If so, and the analogy holds, I was pretty sure I knew what to
do to get her off.  I licked over her clit, up and down several times,
flicking it with my tongue.  Then I drew little circles around it with my
tongue.  Having had her sit on my face while she pissed in my mouth, I had
a pretty good idea that her piss came out near that spot, and if the
analogy holds that a woman's clit is like a man's cock-head, her pee hole
should be part of her clit.

   A little exploring with my tongue found a teeny-tiny depression just
under her clit.  I stuck my tongue gently into her pee hole and licked it
out.

   "Oh yes!  Oh God!  Oh yes!"

   I returned to her clit, itself, and licked and sucked it.  I drew it
unto my mouth by sucking on it and gradually increased the suction until
the nub was pulled deep into my mouth, stretching her pussy skin taut.

   I had read that women take a long time to reach plateau and then reach
climax, but Meryl exploded almost immediately.  She started bouncing and
thrashing wildly as I continued to hold her clit in my mouth with suction
and flicking it with my tongue.

   I discovered that I could make her bounce on cue just by flicking her
clit with my tongue.  I flicked -- she bounced.  I continued playing her
like this until she finally gave in and said, "Okay, you can stop now.  I
can't take any more."

   I crawled up her body and asked, "Now we fuck?"

   "Yeah," she finally said, "now we fuck."

   Damn!  "But first," I said, "I got to pee again!"

   "Meee tooo!" she said in a sing-song voice, telling me exactly what my
immediate fate was.

   I filled that beer bottle and emptied it outside.  Then I laid on my
back for Meryl.

   Meryl wasted no time mounting my face.  Once again, my nose was buried
in her ass crack as she settled her full weight on my face.  She also
didn't have to wait to relax before she could start peeing.  She began
filling my mouth immediately.  I gulped some down that collected at the
back of my mouth.  It wasn't so hard to do this time.  I gulped a little
more down.  Then a little more.  I noticed that I was actually keeping up
with her.  I guess that was good, because she was peeing a lot of pee!  If
I hadn't been drinking it on the fly, I'm sure she would have filled my
mouth several times over.

   She finally stopped and got off my face.  I swallowed the last couple of
drops of her pee still in my mouth as she handed me another beer.

   I laughed and took a few chugs.  I crawled over to her with a huge grin
on my face.  "Now it's my turn again!"

   She put a big grin on her face and retorted, "No, it's our turn!"

   She was right.  She grabbed me by the shoulders and fell back, pulling
me on top of her.

   I suddenly stopped in panic, "What about -- uhm, you know --uh..."

   She must have known what I was trying to say because she answered,
"Don't worry, sweet, I'm on the pill."

   With that relief, I situated myself and immediately plunged my hard cock
into her soaking pussy.  I pumped and pumped, and it didn't take long at
all to come a second time (youth definitely had its advantages).  I think
she came too, for her body bucked and quaked along with mine.

   Satisfied, I rolled off her and held her face in my hands and kissed
her. "Did I tell you I love you, Meryl?"

   "Yes you did, but you can never say that enough to a woman!  I love you
too!  And I have to pee again."

   Shit!  But I had to pee again too.

   "Okay, just let me pee first, okay?" I asked.

   "Sure," she answered.

   I peed and emptied the bottle.  Then I lay on my back and she sat on my
face and peed.  I swallowed it easily, then she finished and got off me.

   She laid on her back looking at me, and I grabbed a blanked and climbed
on top of her again, pulling the blanket over us both.

   "You want to fuck again?" she asked.

   "Sure," I answered and kissed her.  Yet I knew I was pretty beat and
wasted, and I didn't think the little guy was up to one more performance
for a while.  So we wrestled tongues for a while before I finally lowered
my head on her shoulder.

   A moment later, she shook me and said, "Hey sleepyhead, you can't sleep
on top of me!  How am I going to sleep?"

   I yawned and rolled off her, onto my back, and pulled her on top of me.

   She said, "This'll work," and snuggled her head on my shoulder and
promptly fell asleep on top of me.

   I had to admit, it got difficult to breathe after a while with another
person sleeping on top of me, but the pleasure was worth the pain.  Despite
the effort it was to breathe, I soon followed Meryl into dreamland.

   ###

   I woke the next morning as the sun rose through the van's windows.  I
had a slight hangover, but not as bad as it usually was when I got _really_
drunk.  Meryl was still on top of me, sleeping soundly.  But, man, I had to
take a wicked piss!

   My stirring must have awakened Meryl for she lifted her eyes, smiled at
me, and said, "Good morning, lover!"

   "Good morning, lover!" I answered back and kissed her.

   Then she gave the kiss back to me.

   Then I gave the kiss back to her.

   We volleyed that kiss back and forth a few more times, then she yawned
and sat up and said, "Man, I have to take a wicked piss!"

   I must have stiffened when I heard that.  She said, "About last night.
I'm really sorry I made you do that so much.  I'll go outside behind those
trees over there."

   I stood and looked out the window.  Oh man, everything was covered with
ice.  It looked like a crystal palace outside.  I hesitated then said,
"Wait Meryl.  You can't go out in that.  It's still freezing cold out
there. The parking lot is a solid sheet of ice!  You'll slip and break a
leg!"

   "Yeah, well, I gotta go!  Bad!" she insisted.

   "My offer still stands," I told her.

   "Really?"

   "Yeah!  Really!  After last night, what difference does it make now?"

   "Well, if you really don't mind?"

   _What was I saying?_ "No, I don't mind.  I don't want my girl to get
cold or hurt herself out on that ice."

   "Well, all right.  Thank you."

   So once again, I lay on my back and she sat on my face.  Once again, she
sat on me with her full weight.  She even set her legs on my chest and
rested her heels in my crotch, squeezing my dick between her feet.  Like
before, her hairy cunt lips were kissing my mouth lips under the pressure
of her full weight, and my nose was poking into asshole and she squeezed it
with her sphincter as she struggled to pee.  I guess it took her a while to
relax again, because my lungs started to scream for air after a few
seconds. Fortunately, I then felt the warm trickle of liquid splash into my
mouth.  The practice I had last night rescued me this morning, for she
peed, and peed, and peed.  Oh man, it seemed to me that she must have peed
nearly a gallon of piss before she finished.

   On top of that, my cock was bursting with the urge to piss too. 
Thankfully, she finally stopped pissing and got off my face.  I swallowed
and quickly grabbed an empty beer bottle.  I filled that bottle, and
quickly moved to a second when I filled the first.  I couldn't believe I
nearly filled three beer bottles before I finished pissing.

   I emptied them onto the ground.

   Meryl then asked me, "I'm starving!  You have any food in that fridge?"

   "No," I answered.  "Since the fridge only runs when the engine is
running, I can't keep food in here.  Wan'a dare the global environment and
head back to the café?"

   "Sure," she answered.

   So we kissed one more time, got dressed, and headed out across the
glazier, arm in arm.

   "By the way, Meryl," I asked her, "did I tell you I love you?"

   "Yes!" she answered.  "Did I tell you I love you?"

   "Yes!"

   Despite treading on slippery ice while kissing the whole way, we made it
back to civilization on the other side of the parking lot without any
broken bones.
   - END