The Parish Councillors of Little Sprodwell-under-Fosse were having what they all gloomily  suspected to be one of  their last ever meetings as a corporate body.  there was not a single one who did not have good reason to be convinced that their days of elected office were numbered.  The previous year had not been a good one for any of them.

Concillor,   Colonel  The Honourable  Foxe-Benson-Fortescue had not done his already dubious reputation a great deal of good by being discovered naked and indulging in intercourse with his wife's buxom and educationally subnormal niece.

Councillor Evans-Foster was  deeply troubled and fearful as a result of an affair of the heart with a psychopathic and vengeful ex-soldier who was now threatening to reveal all -  with a wealth of documentary and photographic evidence, not only to the Councillor's wife but to a very much wider public.

Councillor, Mrs. Jenkinson, the only female on the Parish Council,  was in daily fear that compromising photographs depicting her in the course of  performing unnatural acts with an Irish Wolfhound were about to be distributed among the townsfolk.

The other two councillors were also aware that their own behaviour, whilst by no means as luridly disgraceful as that of the above three, had,  nevertheless,  failed to live up to the high standards demanded by the electorate - an electorate whose members  themselves  consistently and resolutely declined to uphold such standards themselves.

They were meeting to discuss the arrangements for the forthcoming annual village Spring Fete.

This was an occasion which had become widely famous in recent years.  Owing to judicious and highly unscrupulous marketing,  it had been presented to the world as a relic of a bygone era - a link to the Merrie Englande of old,  instead of the carefully devised piece of increasingly vulgar and tawdry show biz that,  in reality,  it was.

All members of the parish Council were determined to end their days of office on an appropriately high and sleazy note.  If only they could exceed the total takings of last year's event - who knows? - they might even be in with a sporting chance of reelection!

"The "Spotted Lady" tent went down very well last year" said the Colonel.  "I thought it a bit feeble, personally, but it's amazing what a bit of exposed female flesh will do to bring in the money."

The event to which  the good and gallant Colonel was referring was a tent inside which was a platform, on which had reposed the homely,  cheerfully smiling and buxom form of Dorothy Parrish, her ample young body covered  with spots of black paint, which tended partially to conceal much of her strategic area from view.  Dorothy was a non-too-clever,  and,  sad to say, non-too-pretty lady, whose good natured willingness to allow all and sundry to experience the delights of her body more than made up for the said body's imperfections.  In any case, Dorothy was young  and,  to the old and middle-aged,  youth has its own beauty, particularly when freely available for a modest fee or in her case no fee at all.

"Maybe we could dispense with the tent this time round and have the display open for all to see.  It would mean any passing tourist coaches might stop and take a closer look!"

This suggestion from the animal loving Mrs. Jenkinson drew some approval, but the Colonel was not convinced.

"If people don't have to queue to get into the tent, they will see all of  Dorothy for nothing - not that they can't anyway, whenever they like!   No.  Not a good idea, I'm afraid.  You know what the townsfolk are like.  As tightfisted a bunch of skinflints as you're ever likely to have the misfortune to meet."

"We could always cordon off the town square so that nobody could get near the platform without paying an entrance fee and we needn't have another "Spotted Lady", but something more imaginative and daring, involving more than one lady.  The Raynsford cousins are staying at the Hall - I dare say they could be persuaded to help in a good cause" replied Mrs. Jenkinson.

At the mention of these two young ladies, the Colonel fell silent for a while.  These were among the two most desirable young sirens he had seen at any time in the course of a long and sexually active life, a life which had taken him from the North West Frontier to the steaming jungles of Equatorial Africa, the Far East  and many another exotic location where many a sultry and dusky damsel had enlivened his leisure hours.

Julia Raynsford was a delight to watch as she walked through the little town, her firm and voluptuous breasts seeming to defy gravity as she strode around, her bra-less condition delightfully obvious to all.  The gyrations of her generous and mellifluous young bottom as she went about her daily business had rightly been described by the Reverend Mr.  Scott-Talbot, the town's worldly-wise Rector, as "Poetry in Motion"

Mr. Gregg, the local butcher had reacted in a less high flown manner by describing her walk as "A  Fucking  Fifteen-Jewel Movement" . He had further ventured to express the notion that there was no limit to the sum he would be prepared to pay in order to enjoy what he described as "One lovely fucking night with that  gorgeous little prick-teaser."

In a word, Julia Raynsford was head-turningly lovely, as old Josiah Hemlock had discovered to his cost on a famous occasion.  Josiah had been emerging from the hairdresser's one Saturday morning preparing to make  his arthritic way to the Kings Arms for his lunchtime drink, when he espied the fair Julia's splendid young bottom, attired as ever in close fitting Lycra shorts (it was high summer at the time, but this splendid young lady was always reluctant to cover too much of herself even when the weather was far from clement) and his head swivelled involuntarily round, the better to observe her progress as that splendid posterior wiggled its sinuously lovely way along the High Street.

Sadly for Josiah, his arthritic neck let him down at that point and his head remained obstinately stuck in the turned position for long afterwards.  It had been weeks before he was able to look straight ahead without having to engage his old frame in the most uncomfortable contortions, much to the amusement of the town's ribald and unsympathetic youth.  Despite all this, old Josiah remained one of Julia's devoted admirers, one of a long list.

The other cousin was Beatrice Patterson.  Why the two were always referred to as the Raynsford Cousins was something no one had ever satisfactorily explained.  Where her fair-haired cousin was pneumatic and blonde, Beatrice was dark, tall and slender.  Where Julia exuded crude sexuality, Beatrice was ethereally and distantly beautiful,  seeming to glide along rather than walk.  Where Julia was always scrupulously careful to wear the most scanty and figure-hugging clothes, Beatrice affected long, and loose fitting attire, with skirts which swept along the ground as she walked.  It was even rumoured at one time that she did not actually have legs, but moved around on castors.

However ethereal her appearance, though, there was nothing else otherworldly about Beatrice!  Her appetites  were as determinedly materialistic and devoted to the single-minded  pursuit of carnal pleasure  as were  her cousin's.  Where the one used her physical charm to knock men sideways with a full frontal assault, the other was more more subtle but every bit as devastating.  Both girls exulted in the effect that they had on the men of the village although they  were united in their contemptuous dismissal of these men as  a bunch of rural yokels.  They wanted admiration, but only from a safe distance.  When it came to satisfying their healthy and voracious young carnal appetites, it was the bodies of a succession of well-connected and well-born young men from London, rather than the simple villagers,  who gave them  physical satisfaction.

The Colonel returned reluctantly from the mental contemplation of these two lovelies. He took command of the situation again in his brusque and efficient manner.

"Lovely girls both, but a bit standoffish.  I can't honestly see them making an exhibition of themselves to please our local yobbish tendency.  Pity, though - they're two gorgeous young ladies - they'd strip really well, especially Julia!  The bottom on that girl!"

"Maybe we could appeal to their sense of social responsibility" said  Mrs. Jenkinson. "Tell them how big a contribution a successful fete would make to the new changing rooms"

This was a reference to the projected development at the local playing field.  The existing facilities were primitive, with only  cold showers and primitive toilet  facilities.  In the winter a cold wind whistled through the wooden and all-too well ventilated structure, to the acute discomfort of many.

Those of a ruggedly Spartan disposition were well satisfied with this state of affairs and scorned any idea making the place more comfortable, but such hardy souls were an increasing minority nowadays.  Advocates of improvement were adamant that the hardy souls could always use an outside cold shower.

"Why should those two care about a facility they are never going to use" sighed Mr. Evans-Foster. "When they stay up at the Hall they have a superb gymnasium, a tennis courts and two swimming pools, one inside and one in the grounds in the open.  I can't say I blame them, though.  Some of the village girls would love to have the chance of sorting them out on the playing field and making them look a bit less pretty for a while."

"Those two could take pretty good care of themselves.  They aren't scared of anybody and they don't need to be." said  Mrs. Jenkinson.  "Anyone who took either of them on would pretty soon be sorry.  They're both into various martial arts and young Julia is a wonderful boxer, believe it or not, for such a sweet-faced kid.  They were both tomboys as little girls and there's still a bit of it in them now. No - it's just social snobbery keeps them from joining in local events, but I think I might have a chance of talking them into doing something for us. I know for a fact that their cousin, the Brigadier thinks they need to come out of their shell and they would do anything to please him.  I'll go up to the Hall and have a word with them all."