Note: This story was dynamically reformatted for online reading convenience.
 
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   {\field{\*\fldinst {\lang4105 SEQ CHAPTER \\h \\r 1}}{\fldrslt }}\pard
\fs24\qc SENSE OF HUMOR\par \par \par Wizard\par \par \par [Usual warnings
- If you{\u8217\'92}re underaged, live in a community that
doesn{\u8217\'92}t like erotic literature, \softline have no sense of
humor, or are easily morally outraged, go read Winnie the Pooh.  Otherwise,
\softline enjoy.]\par \pard \fs24 \par [Special Thanks to Russell
Hoisington who waded through a sea of spelling, grammar, and \softline
punctuation errors to produce a readible version of this story.  If you
haven{\u8217\'92}t read his Wynter and \softline Jimmy, do it right after
you finish this, you won{\u8217\'92}t be disappointed.]\par \par \tab I
coach a girls{\u8217\'92} soccer team.  It started as community service.  I
got pulled over after too \softline many drinks and too few years.  I was
only nineteen, and my state says you have to be twenty-one.  But I had so
much fun that I{\u8217\'92}m still coaching three years later.\par \par
\tab I started with an eight-year-olds rec program, and now I coach the
twelve-and-under \softline town league and help out with the high school
varsity.  The town league has teams from all over \softline the western
part of the state, so some days we have to drive several hours to get to a
game.  \softline Today was that kind of day.\par \par \tab We were coming
back from a tournament in Whidbey.  Three other teams in a round \softline
robin, so we played three games.  The first two were easy wins for my
girls, but the last one we \softline just squeaked out.  The girls were
feeling pretty good after going undefeated, and I popped for \softline
pizza at the local Pizza Hut before we headed home.  Most of the parents
had driven down to \softline catch the game, so I only had three girls for
the three hour trip back: Monica, Lisa and Dawn.\par \par \tab Lisa really
should have been in the next league.  She was almost thirteen, but her
birthday \softline made the league cutoff by one day.  She was tall and
blond.  Hair cut short and cut-offs cut \softline shorter.  It
didn{\u8217\'92}t take much imagination to see her as a young Kelly Bundy,
except Kelly would \softline never have gotten sweaty on an soccer field.
Unless it was after the game with the lights turned \softline off.\par \par
\tab Monica was twelve and looked like the star athlete she was.  Her
copper red hair was cut \softline short like Lisa{\u8217\'92}s.  Dawn was
eleven, and a young eleven at that, but she held her own on the \softline
field.  She idolized the older girls, especially Lisa.  She was short, even
for her age.  Mousy \softline brown hair, medium length, usually in a
ponytail.  Oh, and about three million, two hundred and \softline six
freckles.\par \par \tab I finally got them off the video games and into the
car about eight.  I wasn{\u8217\'92}t surprised \softline that we were the
last ones to go.  By the time I{\u8217\'92}d gotten on the highway they
were talking about \softline boys.  Specifically about Lisa{\u8217\'92}s
boys.  Lisa had about six boys that she kept on short leashes.  On
\softline any given day, one would be her boyfriend and the others merely
drooling followers.  They \softline rotated in no order that I could
follow.\par \tab Mentally, I laughed at the six boys I{\u8217\'92}d never
met.  Being led around by the nose like that.  \softline The younger
generation has no pride.\par \par \tab Then I remembered Penny Wilson from
my high school.  There{\u8217\'92}d been a bit of drool \softline involved
there, but that was different.\par \par \tab Having a boyfriend and five
wannabes didn{\u8217\'92}t slow Lisa down.  She usually rode to and
\softline from games with me, and more than once I{\u8217\'92}d practically
had to use a crowbar to pry her off \softline some boy she{\u8217\'92}d
just met when it was time to go home.\par \par \tab Monica
didn{\u8217\'92}t have a boyfriend.  I knew from their conversations that
she{\u8217\'92}d fooled \softline around with a few boys at parties, but
that was all.  To hear her talk, Dawn had fooled around \softline too, but
I had a feeling that it was all talk to keep up with the girls.  Dawn
struck me as a little bit \softline innocent.\par \par \tab I never
censored their conversations, so they didn{\u8217\'92}t bother trying to be
quiet.  I was close \softline enough to their ages that I could be the
{\u8216\'91}cool{\u8217\'92} coach.\par \par \tab Toward the end of the
ride, it had degenerated into jokes.  Dirty jokes.  And Lisa and \softline
Monica knew some good ones.  I even told a few myself, knowing the three
girls wouldn{\u8217\'92}t tell \softline anyone.\par \par \tab I dropped
off Lisa first, then Monica.  They both lived on the south end of town
about a \softline block apart.  Dawn lived on the far side of town, and I
had an apartment near the middle.\par \par \tab The girls had all been
riding in the backseat, but after I dropped off Monica, Dawn \softline
moved up front.  Dawn was very quiet as we drove toward her house.  I
usually dropped her last \softline when she rode because she was the only
one at this end of town, and usually after the other girls \softline were
gone she was a chatterbox.\par \par \tab Finally, after almost seven
minutes of silence, {\u8220\'93}Coach?{\u8221\'94} she said timidly.  Dawn
wasn{\u8217\'92}t \softline usually timid.\par \par \tab {\u8220\'93}Yes,
Pebbles?{\u8221\'94} I called her Pebbles when we were alone because the
first time she{\u8217\'92}d \softline come to practice, she{\u8217\'92}d
had her ponytail on top like Pebbles Flintstone.\par \par \tab
{\u8220\'93}Can I ask you something and you won{\u8217\'92}t tell
anybody?{\u8221\'94} she asked looking up at my face.  \softline I glanced
down at those big brown eyes.\par \par \tab {\u8220\'93}You know you
can,{\u8221\'94} I told her.\par \par \tab {\u8220\'93}I mean anybody. 
Especially the other girls.{\u8221\'94}\par \par \tab {\u8220\'93}Whatever
you ask me or say between us, stays between us,{\u8221\'94} I assured
her.\par \par \tab She thought about it as we drove several more blocks,
then finally decided that she could trust me.  {\u8220\'93}I
didn{\u8217\'92}t get some of the jokes,{\u8221\'94} she admitted.\par \par
\tab I misunderstood and told her, {\u8220\'93}That{\u8217\'92}s okay.  I
didn{\u8217\'92}t like all of them myself.  Everybody \softline has a
different sense of humor.  You don{\u8217\'92}t have to laugh just because
Lisa thinks it{\u8217\'92}s funny.{\u8221\'94}\par \par \tab
{\u8220\'93}NO! I mean I didn{\u8217\'92}t get them.  I didn{\u8217\'92}t
know what they were about.{\u8221\'94}\par \par \tab I thought back over
the jokes that Monica, Lisa and I had told.  Most of them were pretty
\softline basic.  Either about sex or, in Monica{\u8217\'92}s case, bodily
functions.  {\u8220\'93}What didn{\u8217\'92}t you get?{\u8221\'94} I
asked, \softline puzzled.\par \par \tab {\u8220\'93}Like the Helen Keller
joke.{\u8221\'94}\par \par \tab It took me several seconds to remember the
joke she was asking about.  {\u8220\'93}You mean, why \softline does Helen
Keller wear hot pants?{\u8221\'94}\par \par \tab {\u8220\'93}So people can
read her lips,{\u8221\'94} Dawn finished, and from the corner of my eye I
could see \softline her shrug.\par \par \tab It made sense to me, I
didn{\u8217\'92}t see what the problem was.  {\u8220\'93}You know what hot
pants are, \softline don{\u8217\'92}t you?{\u8221\'94}\par \par \tab
{\u8220\'93}Duh!  Really really tight shorts, like the kind that Lisa wore
to practice on Thursday.{\u8221\'94}\par \par \tab Actually, I thought,
those were several categories above hot pants.  Inferno pants maybe.\par
\par \tab {\u8220\'93}Well, when girls wear hot pants, everyone can see
their bodies really clearly.{\u8221\'94}\par \par \tab
{\u8220\'93}Yeah?{\u8221\'94}\par \par \tab Suddenly I saw the problem. 
{\u8220\'93}Spread your legs wider.{\u8221\'94} She looked confused but
opened \softline up her knees.  {\u8220\'93}What do you call
that?{\u8221\'94} I asked, taking one hand off the wheel and pointing at
\softline her crotch of her shorts, my finger tip only an inch away.\par
\par \tab She turned the most beautiful shade of red.  {\u8220\'93}My
crotch,{\u8221\'94} she stammered.\par \par \tab I smiled at her. 
{\u8220\'93}What else?{\u8221\'94}\par \par \tab Her color deepened and she
looked down at her toes.  {\u8220\'93}My cunny,{\u8221\'94} she said almost
in a \softline whisper.\par \par \tab Just then I hit a bump in the road
and my finger brushed against the crotch of her shorts.  \softline I pulled
away quickly, but she didn{\u8217\'92}t seem to mind.\par \par \tab
{\u8220\'93}Well some people talk about your cunny having lips.{\u8221\'94}
I waited to see if she got it.\par \tab {\u8220\'93}Lips?{\u8221\'94}\par
\tab {\u8220\'93}You know, lips,{\u8221\'94} I said and, taking a big
chance, reached down to where I knew her \softline pussy was and traced the
shape of her lips in the fabric.  She didn{\u8217\'92}t pull away or look
shocked, so \softline I relaxed.\par \par \tab {\u8220\'93}Those
aren{\u8217\'92}t lips,{\u8221\'94} she stated.\par \par \tab
{\u8220\'93}Sure they are.  Those are the lips of your pussy, or your cunt,
or your cunny.  Whatever \softline you call it.  In fact, you have two sets
of lips down there, your large lips and your small lips.{\u8221\'94} I
\softline thought to myself that I was sounding a lot like a sex education
teacher.  {\u8220\'93}Don{\u8217\'92}t they have sex ed \softline at your
school?{\u8221\'94}\par \par \tab {\u8220\'93}Sure, we had it last year. 
Mostly they talked about how good it was not to have sex \softline until
you were married.  And how horrible AIDS was, and how we{\u8217\'92}d get
pregnant and ruin our \softline lives.{\u8221\'94}\par \par \tab
{\u8220\'93}Sounds like a lot of fun,{\u8221\'94} I said dryly.\par \par
\tab Dawn started laughing.  It was so sudden that I almost drove the car
off the road.\par \par \tab {\u8220\'93}I get it, read her
lips,{\u8221\'94} she muttered between fits of laughter.  Gradually the
laughter \softline petered off into giggles.  {\u8220\'93}What about the
guy and the shower?{\u8221\'94}\par \par \tab I didn{\u8217\'92}t remember
which joke she was talking about.  {\u8220\'93}What?{\u8221\'94}\par \par
\tab {\u8220\'93}You know, with the nearsighted girls.{\u8221\'94}\par \par
\tab {\u8220\'93}Okay, what didn{\u8217\'92}t you get?\par \par \tab
{\u8220\'93}The ending.{\u8221\'94}\par \par \tab {\u8220\'93}Okay, a guy
named Jimmy lives in a big dorm on campus, and he{\u8217\'92}s going to
take a \softline shower.  The dorm is co-ed, but his floor has only guys,
so he comes out of his room and starts \softline walking to the shower room
wearing nothing and carrying his towel and a brand new bar of \softline
soap.{\u8221\'94}\par \par \tab {\u8220\'93}Yeah...{\u8221\'94} she agreed.
{\u8220\'93}And suddenly, the elevator door opens and three girls walk onto
\softline the floor.  They{\u8217\'92}re dressed in robes and look like
they{\u8217\'92}re going to the shower themselves.  He \softline recognizes
them and knows they{\u8217\'92}re all extremely nearsighted and he sees
that they{\u8217\'92}re not \softline wearing their glasses.  He knows that
the shower on their floor is broken and figures they were \softline going
to one of the other girl{\u8217\'92}s floors but pushed the wrong button.
He doesn{\u8217\'92}t want to \softline embarrass them so he freezes like a
statue, with his arms in the air holding his towel and
soap.{\u8221\'94}\par {\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab
{\u8220\'93}Very good,{\u8221\'94} I agreed.\par }{\plain \fs24 \par
}{\plain \fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}I{\u8217\'92}m not stupid,{\u8221\'94} she
said in a patronizing tone.  {\u8220\'93}There{\u8217\'92}s just stuff I
don{\u8217\'92}t know.{\u8221\'94}\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24
\tab {\u8220\'93}You know, realizing that you don{\u8217\'92}t know
everything and asking questions shows you{\u8217\'92}re \softline pretty
smart.{\u8221\'94}\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab From the
corner of my eye I could see the young girl preen and push out her
nonexistent \softline chest.\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab I
grinned and continued.  {\u8220\'93}The girls walk toward him and see him
in their nearsighted \softline way.  {\u8216\'91}Look{\u8217\'92}, one
says, {\u8216\'91}a new vending machine.{\u8217\'92} She reaches into the
pocket of her robe and \softline pulls out a quarter and pushes it into
Jimmy{\u8217\'92}s mouth.  Then she grabs his cock and pushes in on
\softline it, then pulls it out.  {\u8216\'91}Look!  I got a
towel,{\u8217\'92} she tells the other two as she reaches up and grabs
\softline Jimmy{\u8217\'92}s towel.{\u8221\'94}\par }{\plain \fs24 \par
}{\plain \fs24 \tab Dawn continued, {\u8220\'93}The second stepped in front
of Jimmy, put a quarter in his mouth, \softline grabbed his
cock...{\u8221\'94} Dawn giggled and blushed as she said the word,
{\u8220\'93}...pushed in and then \softline pulled out.  {\u8216\'91}I got
soap,{\u8217\'92} she announced as she took it from his other hand.  The
third girl stepped \softline up and put a quarter in Jimmy{\u8217\'92}s
mouth.  She reached down and grabbed his cock...{\u8221\'94} Dawn \softline
stuttered again, {\u8220\'93}...and pushed in and pulled out, and nothing
happened.  She tried again, in and \softline out, still nothing.  She
started jerking her hand faster and faster, saying {\u8216\'91}What a
gyp.{\u8221\'94} then \softline suddenly {\u8216\'91}I got hand
cream!{\u8217\'92} Dawn looked up at me.  {\u8220\'93}Where{\u8217\'92}d
the hand cream come from?  He \softline was carrying a towel and a bar of
soap.{\u8221\'94}\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab I felt my
face turn a little red.  {\u8220\'93}You know about boys and
cocks?{\u8221\'94} I asked.\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab
{\u8220\'93}I know boys have them,{\u8221\'94} she said, then admitted,
{\u8220\'93}but I{\u8217\'92}ve only seen them on babies.{\u8221\'94}\par
}{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}Have you heard of
jerking off?{\u8221\'94}\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab
{\u8220\'93}I{\u8217\'92}ve heard of it, but I don{\u8217\'92}t know what
it means,{\u8221\'94} she said, her voice dropping off.  I \softline knew
she didn{\u8217\'92}t like admitting ignorance.\par }{\plain \fs24 \par
}{\plain \fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}Jerking off is when a boy rubs his cock
until he cums.  When he cums, he shoots a white \softline cream
that{\u8217\'92}s called semen or cum.  It would feel a little like hand
lotion.  So the third girl was \softline rubbing his cock back and forth
and Jimmy came{\u8212\'97}shot his load into her hand{\u8212\'97}and she
thought \softline it was hand lotion,{\u8221\'94} I finished.\par }{\plain
\fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}Oh,{\u8221\'94} she said,
looking disappointed.  {\u8220\'93}That{\u8217\'92}s not all that
funny.{\u8221\'94}\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab
{\u8220\'93}Well, even good jokes lose something when you have to explain
them,{\u8221\'94} I admitted, \softline because this was one of the jokes I
had told.\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}Why did
you call my cunny a pussy?{\u8221\'94} she asked next.\par }{\plain \fs24
\par }{\plain \fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}Well, a lot of people call it a
pussy,{\u8221\'94} I told her.  {\u8220\'93}I guess because boys like to
pet the \softline soft fur just like a cat.{\u8221\'94} I reached over and
stroked the crotch of her shorts once, wondering if \softline there was any
fur under the fabric.  She giggled but didn{\u8217\'92}t pull away.\par
}{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}Do boys jerk off a
lot?{\u8221\'94}\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab
{\u8220\'93}Some do.  I suppose it depends on the boy and what you mean by
a lot.  I had a friend \softline when I was growing up who jerked off about
ten times a day.  Most guys jerk off once or twice a \softline day, or
maybe a few times a week.  There are some who don{\u8217\'92}t jerk off at
all.  Depends on how \softline horny they get.{\u8221\'94}\par }{\plain
\fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}Do you think that Tyler jerks
off?{\u8221\'94}\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab
{\u8220\'93}Lisa{\u8217\'92}s Tyler?{\u8221\'94}\par }{\plain \fs24 \par
}{\plain \fs24 \tab She nodded.  Tyler was one of Lisa{\u8217\'92}s toys,
the one that Dawn thought was cutest.\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain
\fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}When it{\u8217\'92}s his turn to be boyfriend,
probably not at all.  But the rest of the time, probably \softline a
lot.{\u8221\'94}\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab
{\u8220\'93}You don{\u8217\'92}t think he gets horny when he{\u8217\'92}s
with Lisa?{\u8221\'94} she asked breathlessly.\par }{\plain \fs24 \par
}{\plain \fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}No, I know he gets horny when
he{\u8217\'92}s with Lisa, but I imagine she takes care of him in \softline
other ways.  So, he only has to jerk off when she{\u8217\'92}s being
somebody else{\u8217\'92}s girlfriend.{\u8221\'94}\par }{\plain \fs24 \par
}{\plain \fs24 \tab I was trying to think about how to get the subject back
on her pussy, so that I could touch \softline it again, when she asked,
{\u8220\'93}What about the {\u8216\'91}mull-ig-nont{\u8217\'92}
joke?{\u8221\'94} I almost laughed at her \softline pronunciation but
managed to control myself.\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab
{\u8220\'93}After his annual physical, the hot stud was waiting in the
doctor{\u8217\'92}s office for the results,{\u8221\'94} \softline I
repeated the earlier joke.  {\u8220\'93}{\u8216\'91}Well,{\u8217\'92} said
the doctor, {\u8216\'91}I{\u8217\'92}ve got good news and bad
news.{\u8217\'92} {\u8216\'91}The \softline way I feel, I{\u8217\'92}ll
take the good news first,{\u8217\'92} replied the stud.  {\u8216\'91}The
good news is that your penis will \softline grow four inches in the next
three months,{\u8217\'92} announced the doctor.{\u8221\'94} I glanced down
at dawn to \softline make sure she got the word penis.  I knew she knew
cock, but I wasn{\u8217\'92}t sure about penis.\par }{\plain \fs24 \par
}{\plain \fs24 \tab When she didn{\u8217\'92}t show a blank look, I
continued.  {\u8220\'93} {\u8216\'91}Great!{\u8217\'92} the stud shouted.
{\u8216\'91}What{\u8217\'92}s \softline the bad news?{\u8217\'92}
{\u8216\'91}It{\u8217\'92}s malignant,{\u8217\'92} replied the
doctor.{\u8221\'94}\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab Now she had
the blank look.  {\u8220\'93}Malignant.{\u8221\'94} I repeated slowly so
she could hear the \softline pronunciation.  {\u8220\'93}Do you know what
that means?{\u8221\'94}\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab She
shrugged.\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}It had
cancer, they were going to have to whack it off.{\u8221\'94}\par }{\plain
\fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}Ewwwww,{\u8221\'94} she groaned.
{\u8220\'93}They cut off his dick?{\u8221\'94}\par }{\plain \fs24 \tab
{\u8220\'93}Gone,{\u8221\'94} I agreed.\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain
\fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}What so funny about that?{\u8221\'94} she asked. 
{\u8220\'93}It{\u8217\'92}s just gross.{\u8221\'94}\par }{\plain \fs24 \par
}{\plain \fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}Well you have to know guys,{\u8221\'94} I
explained.  {\u8220\'93}Most guys want a bigger cock.  And to \softline
have the doctor tell you it{\u8217\'92}s going to grow four inches would be
fantastic.  Then he drops the \softline other shoe and tells you
they{\u8217\'92}re going to cut it off.{\u8221\'94}\par }{\plain \fs24 \par
}{\plain \fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}Oh.  Well, Lisa thought it was
funny.{\u8221\'94}\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab
{\u8220\'93}Lisa{\u8217\'92}s warped,{\u8221\'94} I told her.\par }{\plain
\fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab She nodded in agreement.  {\u8220\'93}Could
you stop here, please?{\u8221\'94} Here was an empty stretch on \softline
the country road that led to her house.  We were almost there.  I looked
questioningly at her.  {\u8220\'93}I \softline have a couple more
questions, and we{\u8217\'92}re almost home.{\u8221\'94}\par }{\plain \fs24
\par }{\plain \fs24 \tab I nodded, pulled over to the side, and put the car
in park.\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}What about
the tattoo joke?{\u8221\'94} she asked.\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain
\fs24 \tab I didn{\u8217\'92}t remember it.  {\u8220\'93}What tattoo
joke?{\u8221\'94} I asked.\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab
{\u8220\'93}A woman goes into a tattoo parlor and asks the artist to give
her a Thanksgiving turkey \softline on her left inner thigh and a Christmas
goose on her right inner thigh.  He nods and starts to \softline
work.{\u8221\'94} Dawn looked up at me and I shrugged.  I hadn{\u8217\'92}t
heard anybody tell this one.  {\u8220\'93}After a \softline while, he gets
curious and asks her why she wants a turkey and a goose on her inner
thighs,{\u8221\'94} \softline Dawn continued.  {\u8220\'93}The woman
answered, {\u8216\'91}My husband is always complaining there{\u8217\'92}s
nothing to \softline eat between Thanksgiving and
Christmas.{\u8217\'92}{\u8221\'94}\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24
\tab I chuckled and Dawn looked at me searchingly.  I wasn{\u8217\'92}t
sure if I believed that she didn{\u8217\'92}t \softline get this one, but I
was very willing to explain.  {\u8220\'93}Well you see,{\u8221\'94} I
reached down and spread her \softline legs wide apart, {\u8220\'93}she had
the tattoo guy draw a turkey here.{\u8221\'94} I drew an imaginary turkey
on her \softline thigh less than an inch from her cotton-covered pussy. 
{\u8220\'93}And a goose here.{\u8221\'94} I drew a goose on \softline the
other thigh.  {\u8220\'93}And when her husband complained there was nothing
good to eat between \softline Thanksgiving turkey and Christmas
goose,{\u8221\'94} I reached up and squeezed her pussy,
{\u8220\'93}she{\u8217\'92}d show \softline him something good to
eat.{\u8221\'94} I left my hand there as I looked in her face for
understanding.\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}She
wanted him to be a cannibal?{\u8221\'94}\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain
\fs24 \tab Now I knew she was faking, but I went along with it. 
{\u8220\'93}Haven{\u8217\'92}t you ever heard of eating \softline
pussy?{\u8221\'94} I asked.\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab She
shook her head.\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab
{\u8220\'93}When a guy or a girl licks a girls pussy, it{\u8217\'92}s
called eating pussy.{\u8221\'94}\par }{\plain \fs24 \tab
{\u8220\'93}Oh.{\u8221\'94} she said.  Then: {\u8220\'93}A
girl?{\u8221\'94}\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab
{\u8220\'93}Yes, girls lick other girls all the time.  I think Monica and
Lisa have tried it.{\u8221\'94}\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab
{\u8220\'93}They have?{\u8221\'94}\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24
\tab {\u8220\'93}I don{\u8217\'92}t know for sure, but from some of the
things they{\u8217\'92}ve said, I think so.{\u8221\'94}\par }{\plain \fs24
\par }{\plain \fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}Wow!{\u8221\'94}\par }{\plain \fs24
\par }{\plain \fs24 \tab I moved my hand to her thigh like a good boy.\par
}{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}What about the
recreation area and the Twinkie?{\u8221\'94} she asked.\par }{\plain \fs24
\par }{\plain \fs24 \tab I was really lost.  A joke about a recreation area
and a Twinkie?  Then I realized that she \softline was asking about two
different jokes.  I{\u8217\'92}d told the recreation joke, and Lisa had
told the Twinkie \softline one.  I also knew that she{\u8217\'92}d
understood both.\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab
{\u8220\'93}One day a there was a company picnic at a national forest. 
Fourteen-year-old Sally \softline went with her family and was having a
very good time, playing games and eating barbeque.  \softline After
she{\u8217\'92}d finished eating, Sally went off exploring.  Sally was
climbing up a hill and slipped \softline and fell and rolled all the way
down.\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}Her father
heard her scream and came running.  He picked her up and carried her to the
\softline ranger station, where there was a doctor.  Sally was in a lot of
pain.  The doctor got her pants off \softline and found several large
splinters sticking out of Sally{\u8217\'92}s pussy.{\u8221\'94}\par
}{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab Dawn giggled.\par }{\plain \fs24
\par }{\plain \fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}Her father yelled, {\u8216\'91}Do
something!  Get those out, she{\u8217\'92}s hurt!{\u8217\'92} but the
doctor just shook \softline his head.  {\u8216\'91}Sorry, we have to wait
for permission.{\u8217\'92} {\u8216\'91}Permission?{\u8217\'92}
Sally{\u8217\'92}s father asked, amazed.\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain
\fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}{\u8216\'91}Yes,{\u8217\'92} the doctor replied. 
{\u8216\'91}You always have to get permission to remove old growth
\softline timber from a recreational area.{\u8217\'92}{\u8221\'94}\par
}{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab Dawn looked confused.  Or at least
she was faking a confused look.  {\u8220\'93}This,{\u8221\'94} I said,
\softline reaching over and grabbing her crotch again.  {\u8220\'93}Is a
recreational area.{\u8221\'94} I gave her a squeeze and \softline Dawn
giggled.\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}That
reminds me,{\u8221\'94} I said, not moving my hand.  {\u8220\'93}Do you
know why girls don{\u8217\'92}t have \softline hair on their
chests?{\u8221\'94} Dawn shook her head.  {\u8220\'93}You don{\u8217\'92}t
see grass on a playground, do you?{\u8221\'94} \softline Dawn laughed.\par
}{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}How about your
playground?{\u8221\'94} I reached my other hand across my body and laid it
on \softline her chest.  {\u8220\'93}Any grass?{\u8221\'94} I asked as I
rubbed her.  She giggled again.  It was an awkward position, \softline and
there wasn{\u8217\'92}t much to feel.  Through her shirt I
couldn{\u8217\'92}t tell if she had nipples or a pair of \softline mosquito
bites.\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}What about
the Twinkie?{\u8221\'94} she reminded me after a few seconds.  I let my
hand drop \softline away from her chest but kept the other quietly in her
lap.\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}A little girl
went with her father to the barber shop.  The barber got him in the chair
and \softline started cutting his hair.  The little girl was standing next
to the chair eating a snack cake.  The \softline barber chuckled and said,
{\u8220\'93}You{\u8217\'92}re going to get hair on your
Twinkie.{\u8221\'94} The little girl nodded and \softline replied with a
big smile, {\u8220\'93}I'm gonna get boobth too.{\u8221\'94}\par }{\plain
\fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab Dawn was trying to look blank, but the
effect was ruined by the grin she had.  {\u8220\'93}He was \softline
telling her that she was standing too close and some of her
dad{\u8217\'92}s hair was going to fall on her \softline food, but she
thought he was talking about this,{\u8221\'94} I squeezed her pussy mound,
{\u8220\'93}Twinkie.{\u8221\'94}\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24
\tab Dawn giggled again.\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab
{\u8220\'93}Tell me, little girl.  Is there any hair on your
Twinkie?{\u8221\'94}\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab Even in
the pale light of the moon, I could see her face color.\par }{\plain \fs24
\par }{\plain \fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}Better check,{\u8221\'94} I suggested
and pulled my hand off her crotch, grabbed the top of her \softline shorts
and pulled them out away from her body.  Dawn squealed, but
didn{\u8217\'92}t pull away.  I looked \softline down her shorts and saw...
nothing.  And I didn{\u8217\'92}t want to turn the light on, I was afraid
I{\u8217\'92}d spook \softline her.  So I winged it.\par }{\plain \fs24
\par }{\plain \fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}Hmm.  Well someday you{\u8217\'92}ll
grow boobth too.{\u8221\'94}\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab
Dawn giggled again and twisted around pulling her shorts out of my
hand.\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}You know what
explaining these jokes to you reminds me of?{\u8221\'94}\par }{\plain \fs24
\par }{\plain \fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}What?{\u8221\'94} she asked
suspiciously.\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}When
I was a kid, not much older than you, me and some of my friends would act
out \softline jokes.{\u8221\'94}\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24
\tab {\u8220\'93}Act them out?{\u8221\'94}\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain
\fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}Yeah, just for fun,{\u8221\'94} I explained. 
{\u8220\'93}Now some jokes you can{\u8217\'92}t do, like the Helen Keller
\softline one.  But some jokes are perfect, like the dormitory
one.{\u8221\'94}\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab
{\u8220\'93}And I{\u8217\'92}ll bet you volunteered to stand there like a
statue while three girls jerked you off.{\u8221\'94}\par }{\plain \fs24
\par }{\plain \fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}Me and every other guy in the
group,{\u8221\'94} I lied.  While it sounded like a great idea, I
hadn{\u8217\'92}t \softline thought of it until just now.\par }{\plain
\fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}Sounds kind of fun.  Can we try
one?{\u8221\'94} she asked, wide-eyed.\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain
\fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}Sure, which one?\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain
\fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}I don{\u8217\'92}t know,{\u8221\'94} she answered,
like I{\u8217\'92}d expected.\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab
{\u8220\'93}How about my favorite joke?{\u8221\'94}\par }{\plain \fs24 \par
}{\plain \fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}Sure, which one was that?{\u8221\'94} she
asked.\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}I
didn{\u8217\'92}t tell it tonight, so you probably haven{\u8217\'92}t heard
it.  Ready?{\u8221\'94}\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab She
nodded.\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}Once upon a
time, {\u8220\'93} I began, {\u8220\'93}there was a family that lived way
back in the hills.  Ma \softline and Pa and Jeb, I{\u8217\'92}ll be
Jeb,{\u8221\'94} I added.  {\u8220\'93}Now, Jeb was a very strong good
looking boy, but not \softline very bright.{\u8221\'94}\par }{\plain \fs24
\par }{\plain \fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}So far you don{\u8217\'92}t have to
act,{\u8221\'94} Dawn said with a giggle.\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain
\fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}Quiet!  Or I{\u8217\'92}ll take you home right
now.{\u8221\'94} It was an empty threat and she knew it.  {\u8220\'93}One
\softline day, Pa sent Jeb to town with the wagon for some supplies.  Jeb
went to town and was coming \softline back when he saw Rita Mae walking
home.  That{\u8217\'92}s you,{\u8221\'94} I said, giving her thigh a
squeeze.\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}Rita Mae
lived on the next farm over and was a beautiful teenaged
sexpot.{\u8221\'94} Dawn \softline positively beamed at being called, in a
round-about-way, a beautiful sexpot.  {\u8220\'93}Jeb stopped the \softline
wagon and asked Rita Mae if she wanted a ride and she said
{\u8216\'91}Yes.{\u8217\'92}{\u8221\'94} I looked at Dawn and said
\softline in my best hayseed farm boy voice, {\u8220\'93}How
y{\u8217\'92}all, Rita Mae.  Want a ride?{\u8221\'94}\par }{\plain \fs24
\par }{\plain \fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}Yes, Jeb, I surely would,{\u8221\'94}
Dawn answered in just as corny an accent.\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain
\fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}So Jeb flipped the reins and on they went down the
road.{\u8221\'94}\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab
{\u8220\'93}So far, it{\u8217\'92}s not much of a joke,{\u8221\'94} Dawn
said dryly.\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}You
want to go home now?{\u8221\'94} I asked.  She shook her head.\par }{\plain
\fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}Now Rita Mae was horny, powerful
horny, and as they went down the road, she started \softline thinking about
Jeb.  A little ways down the road she spotted a clearing in the trees and
asked Jeb \softline to pull over.{\u8221\'94} I stopped and waited.\par
}{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab After a minute, Dawn realized what
I was waiting for and said in her hillbilly voice, {\u8220\'93}Jeb,
\softline would you pull over there?{\u8221\'94}\par }{\plain \fs24 \tab
{\u8220\'93}Sure nuff,{\u8221\'94} I answered and flipped the imaginary
reins.  {\u8220\'93}Jeb pulled over and Rita Mae \softline unbuttoned her
shirt, took one of Jeb{\u8217\'92}s hands and put it on her tit and rubbed
it around.{\u8221\'94}\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab Dawn
turned red, but lifted her t-shirt and put my hand on her small breast. 
There wasn{\u8217\'92}t \softline much there, but I could feel her small
hard nipple pressing into the palm of my hand as she \softline rubbed
herself.\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}After a
couple of minutes of this, she asked, {\u8216\'91}Would you like to go
further?{\u8217\'92}{\u8221\'94}\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24
\tab Dawn seemed to have trouble talking.  Apparently her throat had gone
dry, but she \softline croaked out, {\u8220\'93}Would you like to go
further?{\u8221\'94} not bothering with a hillbilly accent.\par }{\plain
\fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}Reckon I would,{\u8221\'94} I
answered and took my hand away and shook the imaginary reins.  \softline
{\u8220\'93}Jeb pulled back onto the road and continued their journey.  A
mile or so down the road, a \softline frustrated Rita Mae spotted another
clearing and asked Jeb to pull over.{\u8221\'94}\par }{\plain \fs24 \par
}{\plain \fs24 \tab Dawn quickly said, {\u8220\'93}Jeb, would you pull over
here please?{\u8221\'94} back in her hillbilly \softline character.\par
}{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}Sure nuff,{\u8221\'94}
I answered and steered the imaginary horses off the road.  Rita Mae undid
\softline her cutoffs and pushed them down her legs{\u8212\'97}hill girls
didn{\u8217\'92}t wear underwear{\u8212\'97}then she took \softline
Jeb{\u8217\'92}s hand and put it on her pussy and rubbed it around.  After
a couple of minutes of this, she \softline asked, {\u8216\'91}Would you
like to go further?{\u8217\'92}{\u8221\'94}\par }{\plain \fs24 \par
}{\plain \fs24 \tab Dawn turned an even deeper shade of red, but pushed her
shorts and underwear down her \softline legs, exposing her pussy to my
eyes. I{\u8217\'92}d been wrong, she had just a few wisps of soft brown
hair \softline above her mound.  As she reached for my hand, I thought she
was going to stop breathing, but \softline she took my hand and placed it
on her pussy mound and started rubbing herself with it.  I was in \softline
heaven.  It was almost five minutes later, when she asked breathlessly,
{\u8220\'93}Would you like to go \softline further?{\u8221\'94}\par
}{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}Sure nuff.{\u8221\'94}
I answered, took my hand away from her pussy and steered the imaginary
\softline horses back to the dirt road.  {\u8220\'93}By now, Rita Mae was
really frustrated, and she knew that there \softline was only one more
clearing before they got back to her farm.  So as they got to the clearing,
she \softline asked Jeb to pull off.{\u8221\'94}\par }{\plain \fs24 \par
}{\plain \fs24 \tab Dawn needed no prompting.  {\u8220\'93}Jeb, would you
pull over one more time, pretty please.{\u8221\'94} I \softline could just
see her in a pair of cut-off jeans with a rope belt.  And an old
man{\u8217\'92}s shirt tied just \softline below overflowing breasts.\par
}{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}Rita knew it was now or
never, so she reached over and unfastened Jeb{\u8217\'92}s pants, then
\softline worked his huge cock out.  She stroked it several times, then
asked, {\u8220\'93}Would you like me to put it \softline in for
you?{\u8221\'94}\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab Dawn swallowed
and reached for my pants.  I was wearing sweats, without a fly, so I
\softline lifted my butt and Dawn slid them down my legs.  My cock, which
had been hard ever since I \softline explained Helen Keller, popped out. 
Timidly, she reached over and her hand encircled it.  I \softline leaned
back in my seat and watched as she started to stroke it.\par }{\plain \fs24
\par }{\plain \fs24 \tab After a couple of minutes, I thought
she{\u8217\'92}d forgotten about the joke, but she looked up and \softline
said timidly, {\u8220\'93}Would you like me to put it in for
you?{\u8221\'94}\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab I think she
thought she was going to lose her virginity right at that moment, but I
\softline surprised her with the end of the joke.  {\u8220\'93}Yep. 
Pa{\u8217\'92}d kill me if I came home with it hanging out.{\u8221\'94}\par
}{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab Her hand stopped moving on my rod
but didn{\u8217\'92}t pull away.  She looked up at me,
{\u8220\'93}That{\u8217\'92}s \softline stupid.{\u8221\'94}\par }{\plain
\fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}So was Jeb,{\u8221\'94} I
agreed. I reached over and started caressing her pussy.  Her hand kept
\softline stroking my cock, and damned if I wasn{\u8217\'92}t out of
jokes.\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab
{\u8220\'93}More!{\u8221\'94} she commanded and squeezed my joystick.  I
had a feeling this girl was great at \softline video games.\par }{\plain
\fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}Let{\u8217\'92}s
see,{\u8221\'94} I mused as I tried to switch my mind into high gear.  I
definitely needed a \softline better indexing system up there.  I wanted a
pussy joke, something with a finger, or better yet, a \softline tongue.  I
knew I{\u8217\'92}d probably heard dozens, maybe hundreds, but I was coming
up blank.\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab Then I remembered one
that came close.\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab
{\u8220\'93}Little Johnny and Little Suzy grew up...{\u8221\'94}\par
}{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}Why are so many jokes
about Little Johnny or Little Suzy?{\u8221\'94} Dawn interrupted.\par
}{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}Not a clue,{\u8221\'94}
I admitted.  {\u8220\'93}Okay, Little Herman and Little Mildred grew
up...{\u8221\'94}\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}I
liked Johnny and Suzy better.{\u8221\'94}\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain
\fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}I{\u8217\'92}m gonna spank,{\u8221\'94} I
threatened.\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }\pard \fs24\keep\keepn {\plain \fs24
\tab She just grinned at me and squeezed again.\par }\pard \fs24 {\plain
\fs24 \par }\pard \fs24 {\plain \fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}Little Joey and
Little Lisa grew up...{\u8221\'94} I paused, waited, and continued,. 
{\u8220\'93}...into \softline teenagers and fell in love.{\u8221\'94}\par
}{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}Awww.{\u8221\'94}\par
}{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab I ignored her.  {\u8220\'93}One day
Joey called into one of those radio contests, knew that Elvis \softline
Presley{\u8217\'92}s middle name was Aron, and won a trip for two to
London. He decided that this was a \softline sign from fate and the trip
would make a good honeymoon, so he asked Lisa to marry him and \softline
she said yes.  They were married and flew to London and settled into their
hotel.{\u8221\'94}\par }{\plain \fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}Their first day
there, they met a very sophisticated middle aged man who invited them
\softline to dinner.  While they were eating, the conservation turned to
sex.{\u8221\'94}\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab
{\u8220\'93}When do we start acting it out?{\u8221\'94} Dawn asked
impatiently.\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}Right
now, you{\u8217\'92}re the sexy beautiful Lisa and you{\u8217\'92}re eating
dinner.{\u8221\'94}\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab Dawn
grinned in the pale light and started cutting her food with an imaginary
knife and \softline fork.  {\u8220\'93}And you{\u8217\'92}re
Joey?{\u8221\'94}\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab
{\u8220\'93}No, I{\u8217\'92}m Basil, the sophisticated
Englishman.{\u8221\'94} Then I continued the joke.  {\u8220\'93}Basil
argued \softline that Americans were way too hung-up over sex, and Joey
said that Americans were very relaxed \softline about it.{\u8221\'94}\par
}{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}Why, Ill wager that if
I were to offer you ten thousand pounds to kiss your wife{\u8217\'92}s
\softline privates, you{\u8217\'92}d be embarrassed and want to punch
me.{\u8221\'94} I said in my best upper crust British \softline accent.\par
}{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}When the Englishman
excused himself to go to the men{\u8217\'92}s room, the couple discussed
\softline his offer.  They had almost no money, and ten thousand pounds was
over eighteen thousand \softline dollars.  They decided to accept the
Englishman{\u8217\'92}s offer.  After dinner, the three of them went up
\softline to the Lisa and Joey{\u8217\'92}s room.  Lisa quickly
undressed.{\u8221\'94}\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab I looked
meaningfully at Dawn.  She giggled again and started shedding clothes. 
When \softline she was sitting naked, I continued.  {\u8220\'93}Basil
admired the beautiful Lisa and then dropped to his \softline knees and
pressed his face into her pussy.{\u8221\'94} I arranged Dawn on the seat so
that her back was \softline against the door and she was facing me with her
feet on the seat and her knees up in the air.  I \softline then leaned
down, cursing the center console, and pressed my face between her
thighs.\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab I rubbed my face
against her thighs and nuzzled my nose against the cleft of her mound. 
\softline I rubbed her for a couple of minutes, listening to her softly
purr.\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab I sat up and looked Dawn
in the face.  {\u8220\'93}After several minutes, Joey got impatient. 
\softline {\u8216\'91}Would you hurry up and kiss her,{\u8221\'94} he
demanded.{\u8221\'94} I pressed my face back into her crotch and \softline
rubbed my lips over hers.  I enjoyed the heady aroma and the feel of her
hot skin against mine.  \softline Then I looked up again. 
{\u8220\'93}I{\u8221\'94}d love to, old man,{\u8221\'94} I said, back in my
British accent, {\u8220\'93}But I really \softline can{\u8217\'92}t afford
it.{\u8221\'94}\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab I dropped my
face into her crotch once again and started running my tongue around the
\softline inside of her pussy.  Dawn gasped.  Then she laughed.  Under
other circumstances I might have \softline taken that personally, but I
figured that Dawn had just gotten the joke.\par }{\plain \fs24 \par
}{\plain \fs24 \tab I spent several minutes exploring her small pussy,
surprised at the ease with which my \softline tongue penetrated. 
Dawn{\u8217\'92}s breathing got faster and raspier.  I pushed my tongue as
deep as into \softline her tunnel of love as I could.  I felt her shiver as
the first waves or orgasm overtook her.\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain
\fs24 \tab I gave her pussy a last few kisses, sat up, and watched her come
down from the \softline mountain.\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24
\tab {\u8220\'93}That was a good, uh, joke,{\u8221\'94} she said when she
got her breath back.\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab
{\u8220\'93}Glad you liked it,{\u8221\'94} I replied with a big grin.\par
}{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab I knew that I had to get her home,
but I figured I had time for one more joke, if I had one.\par }{\plain
\fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}Once a beautiful blonde went to
the doctor with a sore throat.  {\u8216\'91}Say ah,{\u8217\'92} he told her
and \softline looked into her mouth.{\u8221\'94}\par }{\plain \fs24 \par
}{\plain \fs24 \tab Dawn opened her mouth wide and said,
{\u8220\'93}Ahhhhhh,{\u8221\'94} as I pretended to examine her throat.\par
}{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}The doctor hemmed and
hawed, and finally pronounced, {\u8220\'93} {\u8216\'91}You have Sahara
Throat.  \softline This is very serious.{\u8217\'92} The girl was shocked
and worried, {\u8216\'91}What can I do?{\u8217\'92} she asked. 
{\u8216\'91}We need \softline to inject a special creamy liquid down your
throat.{\u8217\'92}\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab
{\u8220\'93}{\u8216\'91}Please hurry,{\u8217\'92} she said.\par }{\plain
\fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}This works best if
you{\u8217\'92}re on your knees,{\u8217\'92} he told her.  {\u8216\'91}It
improves the saliva \softline circulation.{\u8217\'92}{\u8221\'94} I nodded
to Dawn and she got on her knees on the seat.  {\u8220\'93}{\u8216\'91}Now
close your eyes, it \softline open the glands.{\u8217\'92}{\u8221\'94} Dawn
closed her eyes.  {\u8220\'93}The injector is very soft and pliable, and
you need to \softline prime it as if you were sucking on a
lollipop,{\u8217\'92} the doctor told her.  Then he put the injector into
\softline her mouth and she started sucking on it like she{\u8217\'92}d
been told.{\u8221\'94}\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab I put
one hand on the back of Dawn{\u8217\'92}s neck and started pulling her
forward and down, \softline while I pushed my sweats down with the other.
My injector stood up proudly.  {\u8220\'93}Open wide.{\u8221\'94} \softline
Her mouth opened and I pulled her down on my injector.  Her mouth closed on
it and her lips \softline rubbed up and down the shaft as her tongue licked
and teased.\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab I was thinking that
I needed to find all my old {\u8220\'93}Sex to Sexty{\u8221\'94} magazines
out in the \softline garage{\u8212\'97}they were full of great and
not-so-great jokes{\u8212\'97}when she lifted her head up, opened her
\softline eyes and looked at me.\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24
\tab {\u8220\'93}That wasn{\u8217\'92}t funny,{\u8221\'94} she
complained.\par }{\plain \fs24 \par }{\plain \fs24 \tab {\u8220\'93}Oh
well. Can{\u8217\'92}t be funny all the time,{\u8221\'94} I said and guided
her back to my injector, which \softline gave her the punchline a few
seconds later.\par }}