The Christmas Rush by Karen Blayne

Oh by the way red tape first.

Be warned these short stories contain mature content or naughty bits and as such may corrupt you if you’re under 12, 16, 18, 21 or 25 depending where you live thus they are not suitable for you so put them back on the shelf and let them age for a year or two.

They were sort of scribbled for fun. They were first posted on asstr.org. If you’ve paid money for this book just be aware the author has not received any payment. In fact no one has permission to charge money for this book and copyright is retained by the author. All copies must be of the complete document. ©2014 Asstr.org accepts donations if you’re feeling rich or even if you’re not.

Luv Karen

Why does everyone leave things until the last minute? We’d preplanned got orders sitting in boxes ready to have labels slapped on them then sent out the door. It was still hell, even I was down on the floor to help out which shows you how bad it was. There was girl looking lost by the door. “Just stack these labelled boxes on the pallet to get them out of the way. “But..” I pointed “Stack!” She stacked. Five o’clock came I looked round the floor most of my female married staff would want to get off home, we still had a stack of orders to get out and they knew it. Phone calls were made, some left, some stayed. Mrs. Preston organised food for those who stayed. At midnight we called it a day, Mrs. Preston organised free taxis for those who wanted them. “Thanks guys. I’ll be opening up at six for those who can’t sleep.” I slept on the office floor in a sleeping bag. The girl was one of those back at six the next morning.

For three days we worked like that. Mrs. Preston guarded the phones to screen out those who weren’t that valuable but even so I was still hit by favours being called in for a particular item delivered by the next day but finally not even the couriers could deliver by the magic day. I put the last six parcels in the cab to be delivered for special customers then I took everyone down to the nearby restaurant for a pre-christmas lunch. Mrs. Preston had arranged it all and we took up about half the tables, another nearby firm took up most of the rest. We had a preset menu and very good it was too. Ever notice how no one wants to sit next to the boss? I had Mrs. Preston on one side of me and the girl on the other. I hadn’t recognised the girl so asked her who she was, what she did and how long she’d been working for us. Katelyn was a student who’d arrived to tell one of my staff her sister could baby sit for them. Oops, I spoke to Mrs. Preston to sort out some paperwork for her just as Santa and two female elves came through the door to the restaurant. Apparently she was doing something with computers and was available for the week after Christmas as well, she’d worked hard so why not, we’d had a good year. She had a dry wicked sense of humour though I noticed as she made comments about the group.

“No soliciting I’m afraid.” The girl at the entrance barred the way. “Shelby what do we have in the sack?” Shelby handed over a christmas-wrapped package which the server casually opened ready to throw in the garbage. There was a pause and she looked to be in shock. Santa walked by and stopped at the first table, not one of ours “Shelby a green package and possibly a red one I think.” The girl got the green package it appeared to be a Nexus 9 tablet. The gentleman got a new high end power drill with accessories.

When they reached our group Santa swung into his stride, each person was addressed by name, Erica who is getting married in the spring was given an intriguing box full of tissue as far as I could see, but she went into a delicious blush as she inspected the contents. I raised a questioning eyebrow at Mrs. Preston “Just a little something for her trousseau.” James who had been looking on with a bored expression came next. He was an excellent worker and team player but could be a little antisocial. The second elf came up to him curtsied then presented him with a large gift-wrapped box. He put it to one side and the elf looked at him pleadingly. Shelby came and sat on my lap. My luck was in, just what I wanted for Christmas. “Thank you Santa.” I said loudly slipping one arm around her waist and sliding my other hand up her stocking clad thigh, attention was drawn away from James as Mrs. Preston dug her elbow in my ribs and told me to behave. Shelby laughed, kissed me on the cheek and slipped enticingly away.

 James meanwhile had opened his box and there in full glory was an O scale brass steam locomotive. Santa’s jaw just dropped, I don’t think he realised just what was in the packages and I got the impression if he’d known he might not have given it away. Jealous I turned to Mrs. Preston she smiled, “Santa hasn’t forgotten you.” We’d had a very good year and I’d given Mrs. Preston a fairly large budget for presents with the comment that if possible I didn’t want it to appear as part of their income for tax purposes. Hence Santa was giving everyone in the restaurant fairly valuable presents. I’d also given her a list of names with how much to spend on each but it was Mrs. Preston who’d worked the magic and managed to buy enough top of the line Nexus 9s so everyone got one, apparently they’re cheaper in bulk and more importantly were brought with before tax dollars. She’d also found out who the other firm was and Santa had names and gifts for them as well.

Andrea’s box contained a kitchen tap. She held it up “I know I have a new home that needs renovating but what am I supposed to do with this?” Sam, our odd job man, called down he’d fit it for her. Sam had been bribed beforehand and taped to the bottom of the tap was a gift token for a set of kitchen cabinets from one of the major home improvement stores. I’d been especially pleased with Andrea’s tactful handling of one of our customers turning a complaint into a major order.

Santa even had presents for the restaurant staff including the chefs not brass locomotive standard you understand but good enough. The sweet came next, real Christmas pudding with blue flames over the top. I chatted a little more with Katelyn and found out she was a computer student who wouldn’t object to working over Christmas so I told her to come in the day after boxing day, about eight or nine in the morning. It was Samantha who suggested going on to a retro disco bar whatever that was. The cry was taken up round the table by the youngsters and a place and time was arranged so everyone could put on their party clothes. Mrs. Preston dug me in the ribs again and suggested I went along as well to pick up the bar tab. Katelyn was looking a bit uncertain and muttered she hadn’t anything to wear. I passed over a couple of gift vouchers for a trendy dress shop I’d been meaning to give to Mrs. Preston before I found out what she thought of the store. She mentioned thank god she didn’t have to go shopping there. Aren’t all dress shops the same? Mrs. Preston would be attending an offshore conference in the Carribean with her spouse in January all expenses paid of course instead.

I’m certain that in my young day we weren’t nearly as wild or the music as loud as it was in the disco bar. I seem to recall that the dresses were at least an inch longer and the necklines an inch higher. Still it was interesting to watch especially the brunette whose dress kept riding up as she danced. By eleven o’clock it was obvious that Katelyn wasn’t used to drinking so much so I pulled her down on to my lap where she fell asleep. I was the designated driver and had the company’s bus to drive everyone home, everyone that is but Katelyn. I didn’t know her address and asleep she wasn’t about to tell me. I dropped everyone else off first hoping she might wake up. No such luck, oh well she wasn’t that heavy, I picked her up and carried her into the spare room and pulled a duvet over the top before I crawled to bed. Next morning I poured some coffee into her and dropped her off home.

When she came in, she asked if I had anything she could do. I thought about it and couldn’t think of anything off the top of my head. “I noticed the way you ship packages seems a bit confusing. Would you mind if I read through the rules for packages for the different companies we use?” Well if it kept her quiet who was I to say no. Besides she’d worked hard before Christmas so I let her do her thing. I didn’t see much of her that week, except for the last day when she showed me what she’d done. Some sort of computer program that you fed the address, the weight of the package and the size and how fast it needed to go and it selected the optimum method. She showed me where to change the values if any of the courier companies changed the rules including the volume discounts available. On the sample set of values I fed in it saved more than 10% than our normal method, I was very impressed especially as we spend rather more millions on shipping than I like to think about. In return I got her to sign a letter of offer for a minimum wage job that covered her tuition and books for as long as she was studying. Well she was in her final year for heavens sake and it was a tiny fraction of what she would save us. “It’s not twelfth night yet and I haven’t had my Christmas kiss.” Kiss, it went on and on and she was grinding herself up against my body getting me very definitely aroused. “Whew that was nice.” with a quick peck on my cheek she was gone.

I mentioned the new program in passing Mrs. Preston when she came back tanned in February but thought no more about it. Well until last week really when two young ladies sneaked into my office and locked the door behind them. I raised my eyebrows at them but before I knew it they were kneeling in front of me doing a dual act tonguing my hard rod. “He’s looking a bit shocked.” “We’d better lay him down on the carpet then.” They lay me down with something under my head for a pillow then squatted over me and guided me into their well I hesitate to use the word. I was just about to spurt forth when the second one nudged the first one off me. “My turn.” And before I knew it she was riding me up and down before I spurted.

When I recovered, I asked what was happening. “Oh we’ve been accepted to do a Computer Science Ph.D. with Katelyn but we can’t get funding and when we asked Katelyn where she got hers from she mentioned she spent the night at your place and afterwards she got this fabulous job at a minimum wage but fees etc. paid so we thought we’d take our chance.” “She mentioned you had a couple of spare guest rooms as well.” Well I’ve always said that businesses should be more supportive of students and it all comes off the bottom line before tax. They have a dress code of course from the same boutique that supplied Erica’s box of trousseau goodies and very skimpily made they are too.