The New Baron by Karen Blayne 

Oh by the way red tape first.

Be warned these short stories contain mature content or naughty bits and as such may corrupt you if you’re under 12, 16, 18, 21 or 25 depending where you live thus they are not suitable for you so put them back on the shelf and let them age for a year or two.

They were sort of scribbled for fun. They were first posted on asstr.org. If you’ve paid money for this book just be aware the author has not received any payment. In fact no one has permission to charge money for this book and copyright is retained by the author.  All copies must be of the complete document.  ©2020  Asstr.org accepts donations if you’re feeling rich or even if you’re not.

Luv Karen 

Thomas walked up the long drive carrying a knapsack and pulled the bell.  At the enquiring look he announced “I’m the new baron.”  The footman looked most surprised but stepped back and opened the door wide.  “If you’ll step this way I’ll guide you to Mr. Hennessey my Lord.”

Thomas presented his credentials and quite cheerfully admitted he didn’t have a valet or a coach laden down with his wardrobe following him.  “Just my knapsack.”  Mr. Hennessey took the offending article “I’ll have your clothes cleaned and pressed my lord and delivered to your room forthwith.  I would suggest some refreshment?”  “Sounds just the job.  In case you’re wondering I’m the third son of a younger son so I haven’t been brought up to run an estate but no doubt the steward will sort me out.”  “If you would care to step this way my Lord.”  He was led into a drawing room and left to his own devices.  A few minutes later Polly arrived carrying a tray with tea, coffee, a pot of ale and and mixture of bread, cheese, ham and small cakes.  Thomas looked at her.  “Well I wasn’t sure what you’d prefer my Lord so brought a little of each.” 

Thomas took a slice of bread and covered it with two slices of ham.  “Not bad, a bit of pickle wouldn’t go amiss.”  “In the jar on your left my Lord.”  “I could get used to this.”  “That is our hope my Lord.”  Thomas laughed.  “Well if you were to live in London all the time the estate would get run down and we’d be out of a job my Lord.”  “Vested interest I see.” 

There was a crash in the hall and Polly moved to glimpse through the open door.  “Alice will be for it now that’s for sure.”  She muttered to herself.  “Alice?”  “She’s new and doesn’t know her work.  I’d say she’s quality myself but Mrs. Fernside thinks she might get above herself.  She’s been given the worst jobs and I suspect Harold was trying to fondle her when she had a heavy tray to carry.”   

“That’s it pack your things and off you go.  You’re dismissed on the spot.  Don’t think you’ll get a reference from me either.”  Thomas got up and walked over to the door where he found a weeping girl stood over a dropped tray.  Behind her he glimpsed a footman with a smirk on his face.  “Mrs. Fernside?  I’m the new baron as no doubt you’ve heard.  I’ve a mind to deal with the matter myself.  Alice you’ll step inside the drawing room please.”  Mrs. Fernside looked most put out.  “As you will my Lord but the maids are my domain if you please.” Thomas ignored her and motioned to Alice to step inside the drawing room and closed the door. 

He gathered her up in his arms and sat down with her in his lap.  She was a comfortable armful that was for sure.  “Now then what happened?”  “He slipped his arm round me and cupped my breast like this.”  Alice moved his hand up to her breast and covered it with her own.  “But it wasn’t nice like yours it wasn’t nice at all.”  Thomas gave her a kiss better.  “I suspect it would be better if you gave her a spank my lord so Mrs. Fernside felt she had had some punishment.”  Thomas twisted Alice round in his lap and put her over his knee.  Polly raised her skirts and Thomas gave Alice a gently tap on the bottom.  “Harder than that my Lord so she cries out.  Only that will satisfy Mrs. Fernside.”  Thomas gave three more slaps to Alice’s bottom.  Alice cried out a mixture of shock and pain.  “You struck me?”  She accused.  “Better than being let go without a reference.”  Alice had a thoughtful expression on her face.  “True enough but I don’t fancy having to go back under Mrs. Fernside’s control, my Lord.”  “Just call me Thomas.”  “You can read and write?”  demanded Polly.  “And do sums but what has that got to do with anything?”  “I would suggest you say to Mrs. Fernside that you feel she needs close supervision so you’ll move her to the room next to yours and install her there with the ledgers and myself to supervise.”  Alice grimaced “Ledgers?”   “Mrs. Fernside hates them and hers never balances so she hasn’t done them for the last year or two.  Gets us both out from under her.” 

“Right take her upstairs and leave the rest to me.”  He sought out Mrs. Fernside and reassured her that whilst Alice had been physically punished he felt further close supervision might well be warranted so he’d given instructions that she would be moved to the room next to his.  Polly would be moved in there as well and Alice would be given the estate ledgers to go through and update. 

This appeared to appease Mrs. Fernside and Thomas relaxed as he walked back to the drawing room.  On the way back he caught sight of Harold lurking in the hall.

Upstairs Alice looked round the fine bedroom.  “Are we supposed to share this then.”  “Well considering it has a door that opens onto his lordship’s room it will cause less talk if we share.  I think the bed is big enough for both of us.”  Alice walked over to the dressing table and sitting in front of the mirror she picked up a hairbrush and brushed her hair in the mirror.  Polly looked at her “Pass it over and I'll do your hair for you.”  “Could you?  I never was much good at doing it myself.”   

“Could you find me a couple of grooms please and escort them to the drawing room and then collect Mr. Hennessey?”  “Certainly my lord.”  Harold went off happily and returned with two grooms.  As he left the head groom who had heard Alice had been dismissed without a reference and Harold was somehow involved spoke up.  “No doubt you’ll be wanting something moved my lord?”  Alice was a favourite with the grooms and they had been known to consult with her about the horses form time to time.  She knew her stuff and just the sight of her smile was enough to lighten the day.  “All in good time.”  Thomas waited until Mr. Hennessey and Thomas had returned.  “Mr. Hennessey I feel we have too many staff for instance I found the footman behind you idling in the hallway earlier.  So I suggest we start with him.  I’m sure the two grooms will help him carry his bags down to the end of the drive.”  “I never touched her.”  “I don’t recall saying you did whoever she is.”  “I don’t think you need go to the trouble of writing him a reference either.”  “As you wish my Lord but I would point out we are a little short staffed.   I understand Mrs. Fernside dismissed one of the maids earlier.”  “We can discuss the matter later but for the moment I 

insist we dismiss this footman and we can see how we go on without him.”  “As you will my Lord.  Mr. Davis would you be so kind as to assist Harold on his way?”  Mr. Davis and his fellow groom moved either side of Harold to escort him to his room and thence on his way. 

When they’d left the room Mr. Hennessey asked “And the real reason Harold has been dismissed?”  “He was fondling Alice and caused her to drop her tray which led to Mrs. Fernside dismissing her on the spot.”  “Which you overruled I understand my Lord?”  Thomas smiled “Well it did seem a little excessive.”   Mr. Hennessey glanced out of the window.  “It would appear news of your arrival has spread through the neighbourhood.  Sir Malcolm Dowding is coming up the drive to welcome you my Lord.”  “It seems a bit quick off the mark?”  “Not when you have a marriageable daughter and the crops were poor last year so the normal London season is out of the question.” 

Thomas found himself quite unable to refuse Sir Malcolm’s invitation to dine with him that evening without appearing rude and as a new comer he was reluctant to so appear.  Sir Malcolm’s departure he thought to go and see how Polly and Alice were settling in.  He grabbed a footman and asked him for guidance to his room.  The footman looked at him “Does this mean I’m to be let go as well my Lord?”  Thomas grinned at him “No I understand we’re short of staff now so your job is safe.”  “If you’d care to follow me then my lord.” 

He entered Alice’s room closing the door behind him.  “How are you?”  Alice frowned at him.  “I’m not sure I like being spanked my lord.”  Thomas smiled “On your dignity are you?  Come and have a hug better.”  She stepped across the room slowly and into his open arms.  “Does it still hurt?”  She nodded.  He picked her up and carried her to the bed lying her face down.  “I’d best kiss it better then hadn’t I?”  Alice was shocked by the idea and he lifted her skirts up and ran started to run kisses over the back of her thighs and up over her bottom.  Polly stood there watching and grinned.  She noticed Alice was looking very pink in the face.  “Best turn her over and finish her off.”  Alice wasn’t sure what Polly meant but Thomas did.  Soon Alice found herself on her back with Thomas’s head buried between her thighs.  It was unbelievably dreamy and she felt primitive urges deep inside her building up to she wasn’t sure but something wonderful was happening.  She gave a gasp and Polly squeezed her hand putting a finger to her lips.  “Hush there’ll be enough sideways glances as it is without you letting everyone know you’re enjoying life.” 

Alice lay back in a haze of contentment.  “Did we just make a baby?”  She asked innocently.  “Not quite.” Replied Thomas content to relax in Alice’s enjoyment.  “Did I mention your other related duties?”  “No I’m not sure what I’m to do.”  “Well you have to make sure he’s in a good mood when he gets up.”  “Isn’t he always?”  “He fired someone today.  I saw two grooms escorting him down the drive.  So the rest of the staff will want him in good mood.”  Thomas thought he could see something coming but quite sure exactly what.  “So how do I do that? Smile at him?”  “I’ll show you.”  Polly loosened Thomas’s breeches and started to give him a hand job.  “Now you take over.”  Alice tentatively stroked Thomas’s manhood as Thomas held his breath.  He knew he shouldn’t take advantage of staff like this but she was so tempting.  He’d be good though and not leave her with child but it would be fun to bring her to the edge again as he had today and he really couldn’t resist her fingers wrapped round his manhood.  Perhaps if she slackened off he’d fire someone just to show she had to work harder to keep him in a good mood. 

Hennessey coughed, Thomas grinned “When we are alone just say the words.”  “May I suggest when you visit this evening you take the gig and Jack would be the person to either guide or drive you.”  Thomas peered at his butler “Jack is no doubt walking out with Sir Malcolm's second maid?”  “As you say my lord and a very pleasant young lady she is to.”  “Well I never was one to stand in the way of true love so you may tell Jack to make himself available.”

Jack turned up later with a set of evening clothes for Thomas.  “From the attics my Lord.  A trifle out dated but still respectable.”  “ You mean respectable enough for Sir Malcolm?”  “Certainly quite good enough for Sir Malcolm and yet not quite fashionable enough for his daughter.”  “I must tread a fine line tonight I can see.”

They set off Jack driving competently slowing down at the curves in the road rather than feathering the corners.  They arrived safely and Jack disappeared towards the stables and thence the kitchen.

Thomas was greeted by his host and introduced to his family including his daughter.  “You must be looking forward to your season?”  He mentioned to Cecilia.  “Father says we might have to put it off this year but hopefully if the harvest is good we might manage it next year.”  Despite Cecilia's mother's blatant promotion of her daughter's domestic skills Thomas managed to escape the evening a bachelor although he was hard pressed over a single glass of port by his host “You must hear my little nightingale sing my Lord.”  “Have you thought that if the harvest is good then there will be more demand for hiring houses next year.”  “You mean prices will be higher.  True enough but the cost of hiring a house, getting to London and then entertaining whilst there is too high this year without going into debt.  I don't suppose you’d like to offer for”  One look at Thomas's face and the sentence was left unfinished.   Thomas enjoyed the evening but did not feel that Cecilia was the girl for him although he felt she deserved her season in London.

On the trip home he had a thought.  “Jack, we need to hire a couple of maids do you think your young lady might be interested.  I don't mind if my staff are married by the way.”  “You might not but Mrs. Fernside would object strongly.”  “Say nothing for the moment but I don't think she'll be an impediment for long and don't you dare say a word to anyone.”

The next morning he met with Mrs. Fernside.  “I'm intent on cutting the staff back.  I intend to do far less entertaining in future so I thought I'd write you a reference and send you down to the Town house.  I'm thinking that Cecilia deserves a season so I'm hoping you could act as housekeeper during that time at the Town house.  You could look round for another post which I think you'll find more easily in London than locally.  You'll be paid until December 31st even if you find another post before then.”  Mrs. Fernside looked at him I'm certainly.  “Are you quite sure?”  “I'm quite sure as of the 1st of January you will no longer be in my employment.”  “When am I expected to depart?”  “Tomorrow at daybreak.”  “Should I brief anyone before I go?”  “I don't think that will be necessary but I'll accept your keys now.”  He held his hand out for them.  Reluctantly she passed them over.

He had Jack brought to him.  “Take the travelling coach with a full team of six horses across to Sir Malcolm's together with this letter.  Hand it to his butler.  For your information it offers both my town house and my coach for the season provided they depart shortly after daybreak tomorrow morning.  Mrs. Fernside will go with them to London.  Oh and if you see any likely maids tell them we're hiring but not before Mrs. Fernside has left.”  Jack grinned.  “I didn't think footmen were allowed to express any feeling?”   Jack put on his formal expressionless face “It will be as you wish my Lord.”

“The nerve of the man!”  “What does he say?”  “He's sending his housekeeper to London and we may travel with her tomorrow morning if you please.”  “Why on earth would he think we'd like a ride to London?”  “He writes he would deem it a favour if we could house sit his town house for the season to save it from any inopportune relatives thinking they might gain access.”

“Well it's a very generous insult.  We might even manage Cecilia's season.  I wonder what his town house is like?”  “Oh it has it's own ballroom certainly, I recall being dragged to a ball there in my youth.”  Cecilia entered the room.  “Pack your things darling in the coach outside.  We're off to London for the season in the morning.”  Her father growled.  “Ignore your father he's being difficult but I'm sure he'll come round by morning if not we'll just leave him behind.”

“Polly who would make a good replacement housekeeper?”  “Is Mrs. Fernside leaving us then.”  Thomas produced Mrs. Fernside's bunch of keys.  “She's off to London permanently tomorrow morning.”  “Well I don't have enough experience.  Julia if you don't mind someone quiet, my Lord.”  “Ask her nicely to attend me.”  

Julia came into the room.  It was rare that anyone took any notice of her which was exactly as she liked it.  “I need a new housekeeper so can I interest you in the post?”  Julia looked thoughtful.  “You're gaining a reputation for losing staff my Lord.”  “Well then we need you to balance out my tendency to dismiss staff won't we?”  “The pay?”  “Whatever we paid Mrs. Fernside plus ten pounds a year extra.”  “You make it hard to resist.”  “That was the intention.”  “Are you still intending further cuts to the staff?”  “There are too many unemployed so I had thought to hire more staff and train them up.  Any who are unable to read and write will be taught and I expect you to arrange that.”  “Am I to teach them myself?”  “I expect there will be literate men and women who could be hired and perform the task under your supervision.”  He passed her the keys and Julia accepted them.  Her style was quite different to Mrs. Fernside, suggestions were made gently and Thomas got the impression that the house ran more smoothly than before.  Julia had a quiet confident way about her.

Alice looked at the books, they didn't make any sense.  Entries for the last few years were few and far between.  What made more sense was to do an inventory and create a new set of books.  Then she might go back over the piles of paper and put them in chronological order.

Thomas agreed and after a discussion with Julia who thought it might be better if the maids under her inventoried the house so she knew exactly what needed to be done Alice and Polly set forth to inventory the estate with the aid of the steward.  Alice looked at Polly as she struggled to mount the horse.  “Anyone would think you’ve never ridden before.”  “I haven’t and this divided skirt takes some getting used to.  I know it’s faster than doing it all on foot but you know where you are on foot.”  They set off at a gentle walk.  Alice taking notes as they rode.  With three of them they could divide the sheep and cattle into rough thirds and each count their third.  As they returned to the stables Alice made a few suggestions to Polly to make riding easier on her and the horse. 

Thomas watched them return and walked down to the stables to meet them.  “I hadn’t realised my staff were so accomplished.”  He remarked as Alice dismounted at the mounting block.  A groom came up and led her mount away whilst Alice turned back to help Polly dismount.  “I should learn to ride myself shouldn't I now I’m a man of means.”  “Alice is good at explaining things about horses my Lord.”  Piped up Polly.  So Thomas found himself being taught to ride by Alice for as the head groom told him she was much better at explaining how to do something and why than he was. 

“Have you driven a team?”  Alice asked him as they came in from yet another lesson and were stood grooming their mounts.  “No, you see before you someone who has no experience with horses before I arrived.”  “We’ll take you out in the gig then graduate to a team later then.”  His maid knew about horses, teams and so forth.  Thomas was intrigued. 

He came across Polly by herself and asked her about Alice.  “Well she doesn’t talk much about her past and if you watch how she speaks she uses long words sometimes but how did you learn so much about a woman’s body my lord?  Who taught you?”  Thomas looked taken back.  “Is it that obvious?”  Polly looked at him “Yes.”  He stepped behind her and slid his arms round her waist just holding her at first.  “When I was younger I was stepping out with Sally.  Her elder sister came with us to act as chaperone at least so I thought but it turns out she was more interested in protecting her sister by explaining about the birds and bees.  Her sister thought she was joking when told her feelings would overcome her so that’s when I was taught how to give pleasure to her but not make a baby.  I had to repeat things time and time again until big sister was confident I knew what to look for and how to give pleasure to both as she said each girl is different about their pleasure places.”  Thomas started to nibble the back of her neck.  “So what happened to Sally?”  “Well she found someone a little older who had their own house so I was cast aside.”  “I wonder if she’s heard of your good fortune?”  “I doubt it.  I kept very quiet about it.”  “Her sister?”  “We’d meet a few times after Sally got married.  After a year Sally was still without child.  Her sister would come and I suppose you’d call it milk me for a few months but that stopped when Sally became with child.  I often wondered if there was a connection.  Her sister married a widower and kept him very happy I understand.” 

Thomas slouched in his arm chair in front of the fire digesting his evening meal.  “Next time you go to town I’d like to come with you.  I need to see my family’s solicitor.”  “Which part of town?”  Alice handed him a letter so he could see the letterhead.  Even he recognised the address.  “We’ll travel there in the morning.  I suspect we’d better take Polly with us.”  Polly was delighted by the idea she might visit London.  “What are you a heiress in disguise then?”  Alice looked taken back at the idea.  “I don’t really know.  I think there is a competence available to me from my father.  Fancy a cottage in the country if there is enough money?”  The weather wasn’t good for travelling and it took them four days to reach London and Thomas’s town house.  Once there Thomas decided that Alice should have a new dress and pelisse before they descended on the solicitor's office.  “You’ll need to make a good impression or they’ll ignore you and that’s speaking from experience.”  He spoke to his staff and next morning a dressmaker arrived to see what was required.  She looked at Alice.  “I take it this maid is the same size as your wife?”  “I’m unmarried and no Alice isn’t my mistress.  She wants to see a solicitor about something or other and she’ll need dressing respectably so they take time to see her and address her needs.”  “A fashionable walking dress then?”  “That would be my thoughts and now I’ll leave you to it my part is finished other than to pay your bill.” 

They arrived at the solicitor's door and were greeted by a clerk.  Alice asked to see the lawyer whose name she knew.  “He’s very busy today, you could try tomorrow.”  “Let him know Lord Drew would like an audience.”  “Of course my Lord if you’d just care to wait of few moments.”  Minutes later the pair were admitted into the lawyer’s chamber.  “Lord Drew how may I assist you?”  “Alice wishes to see you.”  The lawyer peered over his glasses.  “Good heavens is it really you?  Let me see now you were twenty one a week ago if my memory serves me correctly.  We must celebrate your birthday certainly.  I’ll have Foster bring in some cakes and somewhere in my drawer is a bottle of vintage port.”  He opened the door “Foster suitable refreshments please.”  He turned back to the couple.  “You’ll be wanting to know the details of the estate and so forth my lord.”  “Alice I’m sure will be interested.”  The lawyer got up and called out the door “Gibbs my office if you please.” 

Gibbs entered and recognised Alice straight away.  “It’s wonderful to see you once more.  We thought we’d lost you.  When I did my tour of inspection your guardian was unable to produce you so I acted to preserve the estate and had him ejected from the property.  I must say it was in a dreadful state. 

“As you might be aware your father left you a competence of some £200 a year.  Not a great deal but enough to live on if you are careful.  Your great uncle died some three years ago and left his fortune to you.  He had been in poor health for some years and ten years ago I arranged for a replacement steward to take over the estate.  He asked for monies and authorisation to modernise the estate which I duly authorised.  However he went rather further and interpreted my words rather loosely I'm embarrassed to say.”  “You mean everything is lost?”  asked Alice in a worried voice.

“No no, rather the reverse in fact.  For instance there was a canal being built nearby that ran short of money.  He hired the navies to dig on the estate's land to dig a canal to a nearby river and when the promoters of the canal found they had no workers and were out of cash he brought up the incomplete canal for a shilling in the pound so the estate now owns a canal.  With the completed canal the estate brings in some twenty five thousand pounds a year.”  Thomas blinked this was four times his income.  “Now you have a husband I'm sure you don't need to worry your head over such matters.”  “Oh but I'm not married.”  “With such an income I'm afraid you're far above my touch.”  “How much do I have to give away before I'm within your touch?”

Thomas gave a sigh.  “Would you like to marry me?”  “Only if you're willing.”  “I can arrange for a special licence and a member of the clergy to be delivery to your town house this afternoon my lord?”

“Can you be ready to be married this afternoon?”  Alice grinned “Well if it is the only way to marry you I think I might manage.”  Thomas kissed his bride to be much to the satisfaction of the lawyers and Polly who was sat on a hard chair outside the office and had overheard every word. 