Family Days

No! No way! Does Myra know about this?

Roland, please.

Marjune, does Myra know about this?

No, I not tell her. This between you and me, I think.

Well, you have that much almost correct, but you left out Jecim, here! Marjune, I know you are a very good woman. I know you only want what is best for your granddaughter. Allow me to tell you, I do too. And because I only want good things for her, I must tell you, this is not a good place for her.

Roland, I chat Myra every day. Maybe you know this?

No, but there isn’t any reason why I would know.

Yes, it true. We chat. I ask, ‘You fight there?’ She say, ‘Dili! It not happen.’ I ask her, ‘Roland truly good to you?’ She say you are good to all. You not pick a favorite because all are favorite! I tell her, I not think it possible. She say it true. Today she tell me what you do for all. I not believe this when she first tell me. I say to her, you not marry him, so why he do this? She tell me she think it is love, but that you will deny this. She is very lucky. They all very lucky. This a good home. You a good man. Analiza need this.

Marjune, I really don’t want to go into detail about why this is not a good home for your granddaughter. But it isn’t. She will see things that a child should not see. She will learn things a child should not learn. It will change her from the sweet granddaughter into something else. I do not want to see that happen.

Why Jelou here, if this wrong for children?

Do you know who Jelou’s mother was?

No.

She was a prostitute who earned her money at home, sometimes while her daughters were there. The mother was a bad woman. She even offered her daughters to men. Jelou’s life was a sad one, long before she came to this home. Nothing that she might see or hear here could damage her. For her, this home is safety. For Analiza it is not.

So it true what Alida say will happen to Analiza if she come here? That not talk to scare her?

I do not know what Alida told you, but I never lied to Alida to scare her away. I did try to scare her away by telling her the truth.

She is quiet for a bit. She looks around the room at the happy, joyful faces. She reaches a hand out to my check, and puts her palm on it, before turning to Jecim and evidently asking something to which Jecim responds. I don't have a clue what is being said, but when Jecim finishes her response, Marjune simply nods before turning her gaze back to me. There is a calm but earnest expression on her face.

Roland, maybe you not know but many girls here marry early. In the old days, men here have as many wives as they can afford. These wives are young. Maybe twelve or thirteen when they marry. It true we Christian now and not do this. But still it happen here. Girls go to men early here. Yes it happen. What you do, it like a dowry to your girls here. You do right. I think more. I talk with Myra and Analiza.

You have two other people who have to agree.

Who?

Alida and me.

Ha! You on Alida side?

I smile, and shrug my shoulders. It does sound a bit odd at that. Still, I sure as hell don’t want this.

Marjune is not a simple soul. She is a power, and that presents a bit of a difficulty. She doesn’t want to make an enemy of me, and I have the same concern about her. Somehow, I expect dancing around with her is not the best option.

I am thinking about the time I found what looked like a real problem on a balance sheet, many years ago. I was young then. The company's CFO was a real pain in the ass, and scary as hell. The problem was one that had gotten his signature as it flowed through the process.

I guess I could have ignored it but, if I did, I decided I would never be able to look in the mirror and not feel compromised. I knew it might go badly for me, but I walked in and said, ‘This may not be a problem, but it looks like a big one to me.’

I placed the documents and the related sheets on his desk and went to leave. He told me to wait while he reviewed it. I stood there for a good five minutes. It felt far longer, but it couldn’t have been more than that. And then he looked up, and said the damnedest thing. ‘Good. Damned right. This is wrong and we’re going to fix it. Come with me.’

We walked down the hall to the CEO’s office. He sat down. I stood behind him as he told the CEO, ‘Bob, I screwed up on the Meyers contract. I didn’t catch it. Roland here just walked into my office and respectfully showed it to me. I blew it. We can fix it and I will. But you need to promote this guy. I can’t afford to lose him.’ And from that moment on I had the CFO’s trust as well as a nice promotion to a nicer office, a better computer, and a bigger desk.

It doesn’t always work out that well, but I have always been able to look at myself in the mirror without cringing.

Marjune, you should absolutely speak with Myra. I am going to change my mind a bit and put my decision in your hands. But only after you hear me out, and are able to answer these questions with absolute yes’s. If you can answer all four questions in the affirmative, then I will say OK.

She gives me a smile and eyebrows. She is waiting for the questions.

Do you really want me to take Analiza, a twelve-year-old child, as a mistress? Do you understand that she will also learn to have sex with the other girls in this house? Do you understand that this is how Myra lives with me now? Is this want Analiza wants?

Why you ask me this?

Because, if Analiza comes here, I never want to hear from you that you weren’t warned. And I never want to hear that Analiza is here against her will.

These two things will happen to her? Sex with you and the girls here?

I am not saying they will. I am saying don’t place her here if you are not willing to have it happen. There is sex here in the open, between me and the girls, and between the girls. Analiza is going to see it and will likely experience some of it. I have told you, I do not think this is a good place for her. I am assuming Myra has not been fully honest with you about what happens here. If you were not trying to place Analiza here, there would be no reason for you to know. But, your desire to do that, makes it necessary.

Maybe I thought that she become a mistress when she get older, but I not know what happen here. This true. It fair to ask, what Analiza want. OK. I talk to Myra and Analiza. Maybe Analiza need to talk to you. I will see. Thank you for respecting me. You a very different man, but you honest. I agree. If Analiza come, it because I say this OK. This true even if Analiza want to come. If I say no, then she not come.

Exactly.

You want me to say, no. Correct?

Correct. I do not think this is a good place for her. But I am not her guardian. … I should make one other thing clear. Alida will never be allowed to join me. That is not to be discussed. If Analiza comes, it is without Alida, and that cannot change.

I understand.

We put the conversation behind us. I lift up the snifter and take another sip.

Eventually, Marjune moves off to rejoin Iren and the other gals. Jecim is clearly troubled.

Rolie?

Umm?

What she want. It not right.

I agree. What did she ask you?

She want to know if Analiza be safe here. I tell her you are a good man but this is not a place for a little girl. She think this is a better place for the child.

You tell her, no?

I tell her, I not able to explain why, but she wrong. But then you make her see, I think. I surprised when you asked her if she want her granddaughter to have sex with everyone here.

What choice did I have? I wonder what Analiza will say if she knows this. I have no idea but doubt she will want to come.

You right. She kisses me on the cheek before walking back toward the others.

And so, I am sitting alone again, and finishing off my brandy, when Jelou joins me, and decides to sit on my lap.

Rolie, what she want?

She wants Analiza to live with us.

No! You tell her, no? Correct?

I tried. I had to tell her about what our life here is like. She thought I was just trying to scare Alida when I said those thing before.

She know it not right now?

She isn't sure. She's thinking about it.

Rolie, she too young!

I know. But if the kid is here, she is going to see sex. She is going to see it just about every day. Marjune was pushing hard. I don't want to make an enemy of her. Better if she knows why I say, no.

Good. OK, good. But if she come, I teach her so she OK with it and not have it be bad in her head.

Let's hope we never have to deal with that.

The rest of the evening is a party. I eat what amounts to a supper. Eventually, I take my book, and leave those assembled to carry on, as I retreat to my bedroom, with yet another brandy and my jazz.

Having already showered and turned off the lights, I am under the sheets and sleeping when Jelou crawls into bed with me. I must not have been sleeping too soundly, as I am aware of her presence. I reach out to bring her to me. She seems happy to comply, as she drapes an arm over my chest.

Am I the youngest girl you have ever been with?

Yeh.

Jezryl say you think I am too young, before I come.

True.

But I not too young, right?

Bad question.

Why?

Your life before you got here, was filled with bad stuff and sex from a very early age. Right?

So, because I see sex, do sex before I come, it different?

Yeh.

OK, so maybe this girl need to do sex first?

No! Jelou, it was not good to take away your childhood from you. I don’t want to do that to the girl.

You think I hurt? I not hurt!

Oh, bullshit. Remember how you said your stomach used to feel?

Yes.

Well, that is not normal. It should not have been that way for you.

But I happy now!

Yes, but only because you were in pain before. This kid is not in pain. Let’s not give her any pain.

You think I smart about people, correct?

Yes.

So, how that happen? I get good that way because of my life.

You got good that way because you are very special and because you were hurt. Most people are not special like you.

I think this girl be OK, if I teach her.

And if you are wrong? I don’t want to take someone’s life and future in my hands like that.

You say things bad where she live, right?

That’s what Marjune says.

Maybe her stomach hurt now. Maybe she need us.

Jelou, you are wonderful and I never want to lose you. I am very happy you are here, but there needs to be another answer for this kid. She is not you.

Jelou giggles, kisses me, and whispers, Maybe she is better!... before sliding down and taking me orally.

Nah, there isn’t anyone better! Damn, she’s good at this. Too good. It is hard to remember that Jelou is a fourteen-year-old girl when the lights are out and she is doing, what she is doing, to me. Charline was not nearly as good at giving head as is Jelou. She was never as sure about her body as is Jelou. She was never as sure about how to touch me as is Jelou.

So here I am. Jelou is doing things to me that I just can’t explain. It’s like her throat has muscles and fingers. And, at this moment, I swear she is the only one in the world for me. At this moment, I am convinced she is mine forever. At this moment, it sure as hell feels like she is in love with me. But, she is not; she may not be; and why do I feel that?

My emotions want to take me to a place that just isn’t there. But it feels like cheating to not feel love, and get what I am getting from Jelou. I want it to be what it simply cannot be.

But, God Almighty, she takes me to somewhere I cannot explain. She keeps me there until I give her the proof she wants. The proof that she is able to have me for lunch.

I haven’t done anything for her, but that is not what she wants. She wants exactly what she has accomplished. And accomplished it has she ever. I have hardly moved, but I am out of breath.

And now, having completed what she set out to do, she slides back up, places kisses on my neck and strokes my chest. And yes, it feels very good.

Rolie, Saturday is family day at school. Will you come please?

What happens at family day?

Each class has a color. We are to wear yellow shirts. We compete in sports, races, contests. We have food there. It a good time and I not have family except for you and Jezryl. Please come!

OK, when does it start?

It start at ten and end in afternoon.

I am too old for the races, sports and contests.

Yes, I know, but nice you be there.

Yes, I will come.

Good! And Rolie?

Yes?

My math teacher, I think she pretty. I have a crush on her.

Jelou, I am not adding anyone.

Yes, but not for you silly. I have a crush on her. You angry or jealous?

You leaving me?

No!

It’s a girl and not a guy?

Silly, she very much a girl.

OK, then, I am not jealous.

Good! If I seduce her but no blackmail, this OK?

I don’t know. Is she married?

No she not.

You are not to trick her in any way.

OK, I promise.

Good.

Thank you for allowing!

I just did that, didn’t I, … OK. Be careful, Jelou. If she falls for you, have you thought of the problems you may have?

Why she do that. It just sex.

It may be far more for her.

Oh! OK.

I get a few more kisses and then a, Goodnight, Rolie, before we drift off.

Saturday does roll around and five of us, Jelou, Jezryl, Vieve, Jecim, and I, are at Jelou’s school for this ‘family day’ in our yellow shirts.

For me it’s a little boring, and a little weird as I am introduced a few times as Jelou’s guardian. This is just a little hard to swallow, but the truth would be impossible.

We have brought all we need. We have a cooler filled with food and drink.

The gals are having a good time and one always stays by me, though why I am not sure.

A little after lunch, Jelou, who has been missing for the better part of an hour, I gather in a volleyball tournament, appears with a very pretty older girl, whom I have never met before.

Miss Bañas, this my guardian, Sir Roland. Rolie this my math teacher Miss Bañas. She the one I tell you about.

The gal looks a little uncomfortable.

It is very nice to meet you, Miss. I assure you, Jelou is not trying to fix you up with an old man such as me. She just thinks you are wonderful and very pretty. On that last part, I must say that I agree. My ward certainly knows what she is talking about when she says you are remarkably attractive.

Jelou, I can’t believe you say that! And Sir Roland, it is very nice to meet you. I promise, you are not too old!

You, Miss Bañas, either need glasses or are a gifted liar! What are you, twenty or maybe twenty-one?

Yes, Sir. I am twenty-one. But please call me Martia.

OK Martia, I am Rolie… and I am forty-six years older than you are.

You look very young. I sure you will live a long time!

Oh, Martia, you are sweet. But I am taken. However, I think your student is fond of you and wishes to spend more time in your presence. If you agree to it, I will be very happy.

I get an odd look from the gal. And then she turns, says something about the next race and they both launch off across the field.

Why you say you taken? You not!

Yes I am, Vieve. Isn’t the five of you enough?

You not married to us. To be taken means married, or at least engaged! You separated. You not taken.

Technically, I am not legally separated, not yet, and anyway, I am not talking about the law, I am talking about the reality of my life. I am talking about how I feel about you and the other four of you.

Really?

Yes.

She plops a piece of jackfruit in her mouth, chews, swallows, and simply says, Good.

There is no question that Martia is a looker. So does Jelou have gaydar¹, or does she think she is so much of a mata hari that she can seduce her teacher in spite of it? It’s one thing to partake as a bi-lover in my house, but here there is no man. Yes, she seduced Ermei, God rest her soul, but was that just luck?

Should I have told Jelou to not pursue the teacher? I could have, but, these gals can leave me if they want. I am not going to be a jailer. If they don’t bring me problems, don’t fuck other men, and don’t whore around, well, I guess they are free to do as they please.

If this is a sort of innocent crush, I would just as soon be seen as Jelou’s friend and confidant and not the ‘parent.’

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Chapter 34