Soul
Copyright © 2016, 2018-2020 by VeryWellAged
Author's note: This chapter is NOT a stand-alone...The story starts here.
Valley of the Shadow
Four females. Each of them diminutive, and one, just about, wasting away. It’s not exactly an impressive army, but I don’t need an army. As I have nothing planned at the moment, I don’t really ‘need’ a single one of them.
Is this just an excuse to distract me because I miss my daughter?
I do feel her absence intensely. Her mother has been gone for so long that she is but a ghost of a memory. A memory of a memory. Her legacy is no ghost. She is flesh, blood, and part of me. She is what remains. Love blinds. It blinded me back then. Why had I not seen what was coming? I could have. I should have. It is what makes me, me. And yet I was blinded. She is gone and I could have prevented it.
I will never make that mistake again. I will never love again. Just as Erlyn has learned her lesson, I learned mine. But for me, Francine remains. She is both an anchor for me and a never ending reminder of my failure.
Be it Amelae, or Mirafe, or Erlyn, each might have been able to find love in my heart at one point. But not now. Not ever again. Still, even though I will not let love in, I will not allow anything to happen to them. So long as they want that, which I am, to them, I will protect them.
That is not to say they will not be disappointed on occasion. They will. They will have scrapes and bruises. Right now I have two that need medical attention.
The doctor is not expected for a few more hours. Amelae sleeps in my bed. I need Erlyn and Amelae to see the office/work area as it might give them a sense that what is happening is not the acts of god. I wanted to hide this before, but the balance has tipped too far in the other direction. It is a difficult balancing act. I need them to believe I am collecting souls for this to work, but I don’t want to be the basis of some new religion.
I stroke Amelae’s hair and she murmurs a bit, gently waking up. Come girl, let’s eat a bit and see if the other two are awake and desire some nourishment.
Rather than get up, Amelae rolls on to me and kisses me on the lips. I not care if you come to bed late and get up early. I want to be here.
I see. I will consider it. Now it really is time to get up, Amelae.
When the two of us enter the dining room, I am witness to both Erlyn and Aina sitting at the table, with plates that show the evidence of a meal eaten. I am both happy and a little concerned.
Aina, I am pleased that you have found your appetite, but am concerned that if you eat too much, too fast, you will not be able to hold the food down, as your body won’t be able to handle it.
Aina cracks up laughing. As I fail to see that I said anything humorous, I wait for an explanation.
I am sorry, Ninong. I do that right? I supposed to call you Ninong? Yes? OK, yes, good. Ninong, this Erlyn tells me the same thing as I start putting food on my plate. She say, slow down. There is always food here. Do not take too much right now.
Thank you, Erlyn. … Yes Erlyn is telling you the truth. For now, stay away from the pork. Stay away from chips, and nuts. Eat rice, gulay1, fruit, and fish. Drink tubig2 or buko3 or pineapple juice only. If the doctor tells you different, listen to him and not me.
Why not you? A doctor is not better than God!
OK… now listen to this and believe it. I am not God. There is to be no more of this nonsense about that in this house!
Erlyn who has been attacking a Marang with gusto, has her own take on this. We not say it, but we think it and believe it. You do not punish for thoughts. Di ba?
Erlyn, you clearly have a brain. Use it. If I was a god, there would be no reason for a doctor at all.
If you used all your powers, this is true. But you always say, we humans must live our lives without divine interference as much as possible. The only exception you make is for the purchasing of souls. So, see, we need to see a doctor. Yes, I use my brain. OK?
I load up a plate with some cold rotisserie BBQ chicken, rice, and chunks of very sweet pineapple, sit down and lick my verbal wounds. They just won’t give up.
Talk swirls around me, but I am ignoring it. Amelae’s phone indicates a text message. Master, you need to see this.
I look at the message on her phone. ‘My wife and children have left me. I am being investigated for selling drugs. Please tell your Master, I will stop praying to Lord God Jesus. I will pray to him. Just please stop this!
I tell her to text back. What is done is done. It cannot be undone. I cannot ask the Master for anything. That is not how it works. You are the one who threatened me yesterday. I warn you then. Yesterday you say I am stupid. Just be thankful you are still alive.
Amelae has sent the message, but she is unhappy.
OK, girl, what’s the problem?
Please fix this for him.
I can’t.
You mean you won’t!
No, Amelae, I really can’t. Let me explain. His wife is the mistress of another man. She has left him and will not return. There is nothing I can do to make her return to him. The information about his illegal drug activities has been turned over to others. I cannot remove what others now know. Once informed, based on actions he really took, I cannot change reality. Just like I cannot bring the other three back from the dead. … I am telling you that I am not a God. I tell you the truth. For me, what is, is, and cannot be changed. I can ring a bell. But I cannot un-ring it.
The conversation ends. A few minutes later, Amelae suggests they go watch TV. Showtime is on.
The doctor shows up at three-thirty and examines the two girls. Erlyn gets fixed up a bit. She has prescriptions for topical antibiotics, and a pain killer. We will need some gauze and tape.
Aina gets a list of things she can eat, instructions to eat modest but frequent meals. The types of food are pretty much in agreement with my list. He says, no milk products. I hadn’t thought about that. He wants her to weigh herself every day at the same time and keep a record. He also wants her blood pressure tested twice every day. He is concerned with the stress on her heart from her malnutrition.
By five, he is gone and Amelae has gone out to fill the scripts. I have picked up a book that I have been promising myself I would get through even though it seems to put me to sleep every time I pick it up. Maybe, by reading when I have no excuse to be tired, I can knock down a few pages.
I get only forty-five minutes of reading before Amelae requests my undivided attention. Two priests and a bishop are at this very moment sitting in her mother’s house. They have been questioning the woman, somewhat intensely. Of course her mother doesn’t know squat, and that, it seems, has become clear to the three Men in Black.
They ask for directions to Amelae’s home, but her Mother doesn’t know that either and says as much. While this is going on, her mother is texting Amelae. They ask to speak to the woman’s daughter, but the woman, with some justification says she does not have the load in her prepaid cellphone for such a call. They ask for her daughter’s cell number and it is given.
By now I am with Amelae. Her phone rings and she puts it on speaker.
Sino to?4
This is Father Lorenz. Is this Amelae?
Oo. Bakit5?
Child, I would think that is somewhat obvious, is it not?
It is not.
I see. Well, we want to talk with you about this thing you call ‘Master.’
Why? Why it your business?
We have two dead priests here. I think that makes it our business.
Your priests were killed by others. You know this. Why you bother my mother and me?
Child, your Master is the Devil and you are in grave danger.
There is no such thing as the Devil. It is made up to scare ignorant people. You are either a fool or a liar. Leave me and my mother alone.
I am afraid we cannot do that. Our Savior requires we fight the Devil wherever we find him.
You not find him. I do not know where the Master is. All you doing is bothering decent people who have not done any harm to anyone.
How does he give you the money to pay the hospital bill?
He not.
Are you saying that the bill is not being paid? Do not lie! We know that it is paid.
You are a fool. You asked how the Master gives me money. I tell the truth, he not. The Master do that. I do not.
How?
I do not know. It is true. I do not know.
You tell this Master how much you owe?
No. I tell the Master nothing. Now stop bothering me! Leave my mother alone.
We need to meet you.
No.
I am afraid I must insist.
I tell you to leave me alone. It is safer for all of us that way.
Are you threatening me?
Me? No! I am worried for you. Truly. But I mean you no harm. I am a simple girl. I threaten no one. … I think it is necessary that you think about what you are asking. If you still want to talk to me in two days, maybe I will consider it. For the next two days, I recommend you pray to your Savior for guidance.
Amelae, ends the call and turns off her phone. I kiss her forehead and excuse myself.
Tracking the phone call back to the sending number is no problem. It is also no problem determining the numbers of the other priest and the bishop. From there I can build a matrix of associations and work through a myriad of relationships. I ignore the priest who called for the moment and concentrate on the Bishop’s actual family. I can also see some things related to his lay staff. There will not be any deaths, I hope. Five things are going to go off the rails on three continents within just a few hours of each other. Marriages will be at risk. Land will be foreclosed upon. Two children will be expelled from school for essentially the same thing on two continents. I send a fax message, to the bishop’s fax machine, in his office, with names of all those who have been touched. Let his staff call him with the curious information. The fax is sent hours before those folks know they have been touched. The number that appears to be sending the text will be one from a Priest who didn’t call but was there.
It is late. The girls are in bed. I grab a bite and return to my work. This time I am looking at the priest, whose number I used in the fax to the bishop.
I find that I can break into the Bishop’s secretary’s computer. From there I find the access to personnel records. It turns out that our priest is a pedophile and the Bishop has correspondence related to this. I send his personnel file to four different news organizations and using the Secretary’s Facebook account, I share it with family members of the victims. I “cc” a copy of the file to both the priest and the bishop.
When the bishop contacts his secretary regarding the personnel records, he will learn of the fax, even if he didn’t know of it before.
It’s close to midnight when I quit and go to bed.
When I awake and check the doings, it appears that our good bishop has not slept a wink. He has had a very busy night. It looks like the priest I targeted has been summarily discharged from his duties of assisting the bishop. Where that priest is now is not clear. He hasn’t responded to anything since two this morning.
I make myself a pot of coffee and relax with a mango, while I read the news sites. There is nothing I need to do.
The coffee is gone from the pot and the last remnants are in my cup. The mango is a distant memory, as is a banana, and a small cheese puto6.
Erlyn is up first and she says nothing. All she wants is a cup of Milo, a banana, and a puto.
Aina follows close behind her and mimics Erlyn’s choices. We are not talking. I am not sure they are fully awake yet.
Twenty minutes later Amelae finally appears. She goes to the coffee pot and proceeds to make a fresh pot. Once the pot is working its way toward some fresh coffee, she sits down by me, just about slaps her phone down on the table, and just stares at me.
As my cup is empty, I ask, Will there be enough coffee for me to get an extra cup when the pot is ready?
That it? That all?
Excuse me?
That all you have to say, Master?
Huh. Yes, I guess it is? Why?
What you do to them?
Who?
WHO? You know who! What you do?
What has happened Amelae? Why are you upset?
The bishop, he come to my mother this early morning. He drop to his knees and beg ‘it to stop!’ She tell him he is crazy. She not know what he is talking about. Then the priest who call me yesterday, he call me now. He say, why is this happening? What I ask my Master to do? I tell him the truth. I not ask anything. … He say, how I know about who the bishop is? How I know the other priest. I tell him, I not know the names because Nanay not tell me. He say, then how this Master know? I tell him the truth, I do not know. He ask me to ask my Master to stop. I tell him I cannot. I tell him, he should stop and maybe that will end it, but I not know. … Master, what you do?
Is anyone threatening you now, Amelae?
No.
Is anyone threatening your mother?
No.
Good.
What you do?
I make sure no one threatens my Amelae or her mother. That is what I do.
But… Erlyn breaks in and yells, Amelae, shut up! He protect you. That all you need to know!
Amelae’s phone is ringing. She doesn’t recognize the number. Sino to?
Is this Amelae?
Yes, who this?
I am Bishop Diez. Please, your Master has injured many innocent people. It must stop!
You come after the Master and come after my family. I do not know the Master’s mind. I do not know what the Master do. Truly I know nothing, but I tell you this. Anyone who come after me, or my family, or the Master, will suffer. Others will suffer. If left alone, no one suffers. It is up to others, what will happen. Master told me the time I meet him that your god and your Jesus are false. But he will do nothing against them so long as you leave us alone and do not lie about why you collect money.
We all collect tithes. Is your Master demanding that this stop?
No. But there is another church that lie about the collection of money. That he will stop. Your way he not stop, even though it for a false god. Now you must stop and leave us alone. What is done, it is done. It cannot be undone. I do not know if all that has been done, is known to you. I not know what is done. If you stop, nothing additional will be done. If anyone do something new, I not know if it will not hurt you again.
Wait, someone is talking to me… ‘what is it Father?... he patay7? Oh dear Jesus, no!’ Amelae! One of my priests commits suicide! Please stop!
How? I not do this! I not want any death. Truly. Amelae is crying. She ends the call.
Master! Why?
I didn’t kill anyone. I didn’t ask anyone to die. Amelae, I told you that priests are often evil. Sometimes that evil is too much to handle. I do not do that. They do that.
All this because I talk to the cashier! All these dead. It my fault.
No, it is not your fault. You didn’t create a false god and a scam that needs to be protected by all and any means including death. Amelae, if they thought they could stop this by killing you or your mother, they would. They are evil. The fact that they are vulnerable is a new concept to them. They are used to being the ones who can force others to do what they want. But they have feet of clay and that is why they die.
No more, Master!
I am sorry Amelae. I cannot promise that as I have never killed anyone. Those that die, do not die by my hand.
1 - Vegetables.
2 - Water.
3 - Coconut juice.
4 - Who is this??
5 - Why. As is why do you want to talk with me?... or, What do you want?
6 - Steamed rice flour cake often the size of a cupcake but steamed in a piece of banana leaf.
7 - Dead.